this post was submitted on 15 Nov 2023
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

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3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

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6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

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(shamelessly stolen from an imgur dump)

(page 6) 50 comments
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[–] whereBeWaldo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 year ago

2 and 6,

Set up a business with 2 and eat the number 6 in case you lose a limb or something in an accident

[–] LiamMayfair@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 1 year ago

5 and 8. Imagine being able to spook people out all around the world by making their toaster go off in the middle of the night. Also, speaking in dead languages will make me very interesting at parties.

[–] arefx@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)
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[–] candle_lighter@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 year ago

You could escape from anything with number 3

[–] Octopus1348@thelemmy.club 3 points 1 year ago
[–] FQQD@feddit.de 3 points 1 year ago

Probably 3 or 5. Those would be funny af

[–] Twelve20two@slrpnk.net 3 points 1 year ago

2 + 3

2 because I'm sure free gravel will come in handy at some point, and 3 because I can now teleport to the other side of locked doors

[–] PeterPoopshit@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

2 and 3. I'm starting a gravel company. 3 just because it's the 2nd most useful one.

[–] RIP_Cheems@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Free gravel and can speak khitan. You can sell the gravel for money and you can say just about anything and no one will get mad at you cause no one will understand you.

[–] badaboomxx@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

For me 2 and 7.

[–] Surp@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Teleport obviously

Free gravel for money making and Toaster mind control for the sheer laziness or the lolz

[–] howsetheraven@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

5 and 7. You guys are sleeping on the toaster thing. I can control the most unsafe electrical appliance with my mind? The possibilities are endless.

Along with knowing whether things are empty. I'd be the perfect bouncer.

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4 and 5.

toasters are cool. having them do your bidding? priceless.

4 because I am a kind and generous person. free noses for everybody~*!

~*you~ ~can~ ~opt-out~

Depends on the teleport cool down, but that's the obvious first choice. From there it's tough between 1, 2, and 5...

[–] Simulation6@sopuli.xyz 3 points 1 year ago

3 and 6. There was no limit to how often you can use the power, so just spam them. Look 20 and fly.

[–] Knetsqu@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago
[–] Kushia@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 year ago

Doesn't say there's a limit on how many pills of your choice you can take so I assume you'll get an ongoing prescription of them. In which case, I'm taking 6 and reliving my 20s forever.

[–] Nikls94@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

2 and 5

2 because gravel can be sold

5 because imagine you’re in a hotel and just mess with people

[–] Daft_ish@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Run as fast as Albert Einstein would be a godsend for someone who is paralyzed.

[–] whoisearth@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 year ago

But as soon as you stop running you're paralyzed again. So says the monkeys paw

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