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[-] original_reader@lemm.ee 61 points 1 year ago

What does "out of my league" even mean?

The concept of someone being "out of my league" is a myth. We really should stop putting people in these categories and instead see everyone as an equal challenge. By labeling someone as "out of my league," I am limiting myself and degrading the people who I think are "in my league." It's better to focus on people we're genuinely interested in and not place them on such a high pedestal that they feel they need to be worshipped. Rather place them high enough to think they are prized. The people we date are the ones who we think are great, and we believe they could make us great too.

I feel we should remember that no one is out of anyone's league. We should rather focus our attention on a person we're genuinely interested in and challenge ourselves.

You never know what might happen until you try.

[-] Asafum@feddit.nl 4 points 1 year ago

I mean I get it, but I'm a short, balding, blue collar schmuck with no education above a trade school after highschool. There absolutely is a league and I'm not in it, I'm not even in the same sport as some people.

To use the rather gross scale for reference a 6/10 with a good job and a degree wouldn't spend 2 seconds thinking about dating me, she's got 262948291 options that are better than me. That's what out of my league is. It's that line of chads in the image, they're all the people that are better than me. Usually people talk about looks, but it's also the whole package of what you have to offer. All I have is the clown outfit.

I've used dating sites where I can't even get responses from 2/10s, they were put together with decent jobs just not attractive, even they dont give me the time of day. There are people that are just out of your reach, they won't pay you any mind because you are "beneath" them, as in they can do better and they know it.

No shame or disrespect in that, know your worth and aim for the best you can get. I don't blame people for not giving me a shot, they're smart lol. For me the limit is somewhere between brain dead and animatronic women lol

[-] uxia@midwest.social 3 points 1 year ago

What do you mean by 2/10 like is that your own subjective rating? What do you mean by "do better?" Like people are so freaking complex, for me no measurement scale can encapsulate it all.

[-] Asafum@feddit.nl 2 points 1 year ago

I suppose it's a subjective thing, but I think once you're lower than 3 that's where most people would agree that you're not generally physically attractive.

By "do better" I mean finding a more attractive person with a better job and is humorous.

Being "nice" and "funny" are like condiments on a sandwich: they're nice to have, but people are looking for the turkey, ham, whatever sandwich and are happy to have nice condiments if they're there, but if they aren't it's not a big deal. I'm not winning anyone more attractive or even equally attractive with my ketchup ass self lol

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this post was submitted on 12 Sep 2023
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