Can you go careening around twisty mountain roads with the top down with a 6 speed manual stick with that watch? No? I'll take my Miata any day. Good luck with your time keeping.

"It's certainly a nice looking piece of jewelry"

See this casio watch? Still more accurate than whatever the fuck watch you have

"People with true value don’t need trinkets to convince others of their worth."

"Not everybody knows how to make the best use of their resources."

"Unless it has a button that stops time, you paid too much."

I think the really wealthy old-money people would never say such a thing. Because such a thing just wouldn't occur to them. And if someone said that to them, they'd just kind of smile and nod the same way they would to a toddler. Maybe say "Ah, yes, very good." So that's probably the best response.

But if I were writing a screenplay and had to come up with a one-liner I'd probably go with, "Just goes to show you can't buy class."

You see this? This is called a "smart phone." Not only will this tell me the time like your watch, but it can also do a bunch of other things. I can look at pictures of raccoons wearing silly hats or I can use it to insult someone on the other side of the planet. It also cost a fraction of what your watch cost. I'm sorry to tell you this, but I think it should go and get your money back. It sounds like you've been scammed. As a matter of fact, let me give you my friend's phone number. He's an accountant, and I think he'll be able to help stop you from making stupid purchases in the future.

Does 0 to 60 in ONE minute! It's garbage.

"So, you're both rich and stupid"

Has this one done it? or how many such watches in do you get to be happy?

Sorry I'm not into bracelets

The statement is to set them apart from from you and to display power. So you could go with something like,

"Shit, they still make you buy your uniform when you rich eh. Some things never change."

But more elegantly. Reassert that they are subject to others' power/approval and relate to them to assert that they're no different from you.

"Was it meant to make you happier? I'm not sure it worked."

Yeah, but can your watch drive you to the store ?

"I don't have the habit of looking at other people's watches. Thanks for pointing it out, I guess, I might have otherwise missed that detail entirely."

(Biz-bro mind cannot comprehend this)

"Nice, but I kinda prefer the newer model from the spring catalogue. The subtle off-white coloring. The tasteful thickness of it. Oh my God, it even has a watermark."

I have friends.

And I have the same watch, but paid $25 for it on a market in Cambodia.

“Common sense is a flower that does not grow in everyone’s garden”

And it tells the same time as a $5 Casio, but it's heavy and gaudy. I guess money can't buy taste.

"Wow, you're really shit at bargaining. They really took you for a ride!"

Tell him I still banged your mom tho

"You got it wrong, expensive watches dont go faster"

"What's your point?"

"My wealth is in stocks"

"I wouldn't want to paint a target on my back like that. Did you hear about Chesterwick's son getting kidnapped while backpacking in Burma?"

You paid that much for a watch that looks like you steal from your grandad?

"Oh, am I supposed to kiss it?"