this post was submitted on 22 Jun 2023
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Asklemmy
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Everything about this is fantastic. This level of shitposting is exactly what the fediverse needs
I didn't see this answer, so sorry if it's been said, but just don't eat. It's three days, after all. Incidentally I've read that if you ate solely what your body needed to survive, it would take 20-40 days to even build up enough waste to have to poop.
This is absolutely correct. You can survive just fine for three days with no food. You'll be tired and cranky but alive.
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You're going to end up needing a knife...
Eat a full MRE the day before. Good luck ever pooping again.
Op is gonna meet their stinky penpal in person and wants to save a special gift for when they get together, how romantic ๐
This post is truly glorious, this should be the founding exhibit of the museum of Lemmy.
I am truly grateful to witness this moment.
In case OP is still with us, my advice would be anti diarrhoea medication, consume minimum liquids, avoid fibre, pack MREs which are often formulated to be a bit constipating. But above all, question why on earth you would be doing this in the first place!
this is it. this is the critical point of quality the fediverse needed
You're gonna need a bigger knife
I have a friend who was in the army and said they had to do 100+km training hikes. No one wanted to have to stop to poo so the first thing they did, before even starting, was to eat the block of cheese from their ration packs. They called it plug cheese.
It's called a low residue diet https://badgut.org/information-centre/health-nutrition/low-residue-diet/
Leaving a comment to be part of Lemmy history.
Just don't eat anything. For three days you should be fine. If your stomach hurts just drink water.
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I wonder how he will behave as soon as the first thing the date does in the tent is, unceremoniously, going for a poop.
This post is gold. To parrot a couple others, anti-diarrhea medicine always locks me up for a day or two
Are you planning to film one of those "shipping myself in a box" videos? ๐ญ
Not sure if this is a troll post...
But in case not, in my experience black chocolate and banana helps in these kind of situations...
And don't drink apple or grape juice, or the opposite will happen ๐
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Just tell us the reason.
please stop talking about how this post is going to be on lectures 10 years later and help this guy, he NEED help lmao
I was here witnessing lemmy history being made and I will probably die of curiosity if we do not get an update. I do not have any tips. I just hope that you come back safe and sound.
You could try surviving on Soylent or an equivalent. It's the nutrients you need to stay alive and operating normally stripped down to the bare minimum (so less material for you to have to poop). It might be diluted in water but that could be minimised and that small amount would probably leave you though sweat/breath anyway.
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