this post was submitted on 20 Nov 2024
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FediLore + Fedidrama
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Chronicle the life and tale of the fediverse (+ matrix)
Largely a sublemmy about capturing drama, from fediverse spanning drama to just lemmy drama.
Includes lore like how a instance got it's name, how an instance got defederated, how an admin got doxxed, fedihistory etc
(New) This sub's intentions is to an archive/newspaper, as in preferably don't get into fights with each other or the ppl featured in the drama
Tags: fediverse news, lemmy news, lemmyverse
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It's not an adult-like response. I expect this kind of thing from a child or someone who's emotionally manipulative. Setting boundaries is part of everyday life. Agreeing/disagreeing with the boundary is also part of everyday life. Blowing it out of proportion just tells me this person cannot handle being told something they don't like. You don't jump to extremes when someone makes a request of you. That's not healthy.
This will be a difference in opinion. But I genuinely don't see it that way. Saying "you're a mod too, so you should know where I'm coming from and what these rules mean" is not out of line in the slightest. And commenting on a trend or a habit is also not a "nono" in my books. I honestly don't see it as antagonistic in the slightest.
I see where you're coming from about the behavior of managers and speaking to the other mod. It's not technically incorrect for you to make that comment. But at the end of the day our mods are all volunteers who also have personal lives. They don't get paid for this. Comparing them to a professional manager, who is trained, vetted, and paid to be what a company wants them to be is not a fair comparison if I'm being honest. This is a community driven environment. Our mods are mods because they care. Acting hostile to them when they're just trying their best is not a good look. I've had some of my comments removed at times. I didn't agree with it but I let it slide because I don't feel like it should be made a big deal.
"you're a mod too, so you should know where I'm coming from and what these rules mean" is a whole lot of a different sentence than "you should know better". That's what I'm saying - you and I can sit down on the toilet and think of a million ways of saying it better. Happening for months doesn't need to be brought up - you are reacting to what is happening now and what you want to happen instead. Dwelling on the past is counterproductive. You are informing a user for the very first time about something they shouldn't be doing - they know it then and there. Mentioning "you have made this mistake multiple times now but I didn't say anything!" is blaming someone for not reading your mind. If it happens after you confronted someone and you did it again? Sure, bring up the previous conversation.
Even if you go the confrontation route - I see a misinfo report that shouldn't be that, please don't report things as these comments. - oh I disagree - that's your right but ultimately I'm asking you to stop reporting comments like these - oh then I'll stop reporting alltogether - i'd rather you still reported abuse, but please don't report opinion as misinfo. Thank you.
End scene. No need to keep arguing, no need for personal feelings, no need for bad communication.
Mods being volunteers with personal lives doesn't really excuse a bad interaction. Just because companies train people for something doesn't mean it is some esoteric knowledge. It needs to be pointed out to "level" the knowledge of every single manager / tlead. But at the end of the day, it's just good listening and objectively looking at something, and not letting your emotions get the better of you.
I see where you're coming from, but I just don't agree with it. I think this is just a case where we'll have to agree to disagree. Hopefully, you don't take it personally because you did actually provide some thought provoking comments. Hope you enjoy the rest of your day.