this post was submitted on 22 Jan 2025
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[–] GrumpyDuckling@sh.itjust.works 31 points 13 hours ago (6 children)

You'd better have a tv license or your going to jail

[–] SeekPie@lemm.ee 1 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

I've heard this joke many times, never understood it.

Does UK need licenses for everything or something?

[–] GrumpyDuckling@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 hours ago

They have a license you're supposed to have to watch the BBC basically a TV tax for people who actually watch it. License enforcement has always been off their rockers. Back in the day they said they had a TV detector van that they would drive around and detect if you were watching a TV without a license. They send you threatening letters if you don't have a license. They'll even come to your door and try to make you prove you don't have a tv. You can just tell them to leave.

[–] dellish@lemmy.world 6 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

Or learn the old "eat the TV before the inspector arrives".

I guess I'm showing my age, but hopefully enough old folks get it.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 1 points 4 hours ago

"Don't worry, lads. I always poo before I get up."

[–] Freefall@lemmy.world 23 points 13 hours ago

Hopefully OP can live with trading "needing a TV license for a TV no one uses anymore" and "actual healthcare" for a "failing democracy turned Christian nationalist oligarchy"!

[–] casmael@lemm.ee 16 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Oi sunny boy u got a loisense for that loisense?!

[–] GrumpyDuckling@sh.itjust.works 7 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Let me see your license request license

[–] casmael@lemm.ee 8 points 12 hours ago

Oi sonny Jim this isn’t a loisense request this is a loisense request request it’s a different department Oi hope you’ve got all yer paperwerk in order jimbo

[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 11 points 13 hours ago (3 children)

Only if you have a TV. Theoretically, you need one to stream the BBC/ITV and such on a computer/phone, but the onus is not on you to prove that you didn’t. You’ll get letters asking to confirm that you don’t need a licence, and then threats of an inspection to make sure you don’t have a TV that’s on and being used to watch TV, though I’m not sure if they follow through with the latter. (In the analogue days, they had detector vans that either could detect TV tuners tuned to channels or were a bluff to get people to pay up, though they seem to have given up on that.)

[–] Kazumara@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 3 hours ago

Ah interesting, here in Switzerland the rule was if you have a capable device that's enough. They didn't have to prove usage.

And now that they also stream online, any computer and smartphone counts. So they recently changed the rules to just charge every household.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 10 points 10 hours ago

The detector vans were real, and they weren't a bluff, but the tech they used wasn't some high tech signal detector. The secret is that they just pointed a parabolic microphone (possibly a laser microphone at a later time) at your window and listened for the audio. The operator would flip through TV channels in his van and try to match the audio from your house to the audio from a currently broadcasting TV station. That was sufficient to determine if someone was watching broadcast tv or not.

[–] MY_ANUS_IS_BLEEDING@lemm.ee 6 points 12 hours ago

They don't follow up on the threats - or at least not regularly. (9 years and counting here - even if I somehow get caught and fined the max amount I've still saved money)

[–] weirdbeardgame@lemmy.world -1 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 12 hours ago) (1 children)

And a stabbing license

Edit: Y'all motherfuckers need to get educated https://youtu.be/g1HQ3Eyu2Jw

[–] Freefall@lemmy.world 7 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago)

Stabbing? American here, never heard of it...., it's like shooting but no range, lower body count, and not something a physically inferior person can do to anyone equally effectively, right?