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So, on pronouns. (lemmy.ml)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by shapis@lemmy.ml to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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I have a few questions on how to best behave to be as welcoming and inclusive as possible without sounding bad. I hope you guys don't hate me.

I'm just a straight male. Are my pronouns he/him? Is that how I should tell people? Do you actually tell them as you meet them ? Do I have to wait for a certain social cue ?

How about online. Should I tell people or have it on my personal profile somewhere?

And about respecting other people's pronouns. How do i figure them out ? Is it a big faux pas if I don't before I know them ? Is it a faux pas if I refer to someone I just met and I assumed to be male as he/him?

I've never seen anyone referring to anyone irl by non conventional pronouns. Is it an actual thing or is it currently being pushed to make the world a more inclusive place?

I'd love some help with all of this.

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[–] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 year ago

or would that generally be regarded as, well, something akin to cultural appropriation? or as malicious adoption, like “i identify as an attack helicopter”?

It's none of those things.

It's more akin to pretending your name is Matt even though your name is Tom. You're not going to offend anyone, and if it turns out that Matt feels right for you, then go for it, you're Matt now. But if you're not Matt, and don't feel like Matt, then calling yourself Matt won't achieve much for you or anyone else.