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So, on pronouns. (lemmy.ml)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by shapis@lemmy.ml to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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I have a few questions on how to best behave to be as welcoming and inclusive as possible without sounding bad. I hope you guys don't hate me.

I'm just a straight male. Are my pronouns he/him? Is that how I should tell people? Do you actually tell them as you meet them ? Do I have to wait for a certain social cue ?

How about online. Should I tell people or have it on my personal profile somewhere?

And about respecting other people's pronouns. How do i figure them out ? Is it a big faux pas if I don't before I know them ? Is it a faux pas if I refer to someone I just met and I assumed to be male as he/him?

I've never seen anyone referring to anyone irl by non conventional pronouns. Is it an actual thing or is it currently being pushed to make the world a more inclusive place?

I'd love some help with all of this.

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[–] stealth_cookies@lemmy.ca 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Your pronouns are whatever you would like to be referred to. Generally someone would either correct you or you would hear the right ones during conversation to learn someone else's. If they outwardly present as a specific gender then I would normally assume (or default to they/them) and just apologize and correct if someone corrects me. Most normal people will take such an interaction in stride without further thought.

In terms of online, people often add it to their profile so you know, or to indicate to others that you respect their choice of pronouns.

[–] blindsight@beehaw.org 6 points 1 year ago

In terms of online, people often add it to their profile so you know, or to indicate to others that you respect their choice of pronouns.

This is the only reason I show my pronouns in my email signature and in virtual meetings. I think it's important to normalize that people have and use different pronouns and, as an educator, it's my responsibility to infuse SOGI (sexual orientation and gender identity) into my practices. Every action, however small, moves the needle.

Come to think of it, I should probably figure out how to do that on Lemmy, since I think there's display name settings?