this post was submitted on 20 Sep 2023
76 points (88.8% liked)

Autism

6842 readers
5 users here now

A community for respectful discussion and memes related to autism acceptance. All neurotypes are welcome.

We have created our own instance! Visit Autism Place the following community for more info.

Community:

Values

  • Acceptance
  • Openness
  • Understanding
  • Equality
  • Reciprocity
  • Mutuality
  • Love

Rules

  1. No abusive, derogatory, or offensive post/comments e.g: racism, sexism, religious hatred, homophobia, gatekeeping, trolling.
  2. Posts must be related to autism, off-topic discussions happen in the matrix chat.
  3. Your posts must include a text body. It doesn't have to be long, it just needs to be descriptive.
  4. Do not request donations.
  5. Be respectful in discussions.
  6. Do not post misinformation.
  7. Mark NSFW content accordingly.
  8. Do not promote Autism Speaks.
  9. General Lemmy World rules.

Encouraged

  1. Open acceptance of all autism levels as a respectable neurotype.
  2. Funny memes.
  3. Respectful venting.
  4. Describe posts of pictures/memes using text in the body for our visually impaired users.
  5. Welcoming and accepting attitudes.
  6. Questions regarding autism.
  7. Questions on confusing situations.
  8. Seeking and sharing support.
  9. Engagement in our community's values.
  10. Expressing a difference of opinion without directly insulting another user.
  11. Please report questionable posts and let the mods deal with it. Chat Room
  • We have a chat room! Want to engage in dialogue? Come join us at the community's Matrix Chat.

.

Helpful Resources

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
BackOnMyBS@lemmy.world
76
being "confident" doesn't mean you should double check just to be sure, it means you should pretend to be certain about things you are not certain about. (feddit.de)
submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by nichtsowichtig@feddit.de to c/autism@lemmy.world
30 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

I've spent some time reflecting yesterday and I realized that. When people want you to be confident they don't want you to be actually confident, they want you to pretend you are. It is idiotic and makes no sense, but it explains a lot of situations in which I behaved the wrong way.

confidence to me means the opposite of that. it means questioning your asssumptions, approaching things from a different angle, reflect, recalculate, asking for a second opinion. Because I'll end up with greater confidence that my assertions are more truthful. But apparently doing all that makes people think I'm insecure. Shit!

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] Deestan@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

To add to this, what feels like "faking" confidence can be reframed as not needlessly pointing out the risks and insecurities that are inherent in any action or knowledge. It's not dishonest, because some level of uncertainty should be assumed.

If I guide my friends through a city and go "eeeeh... I think it is maybe this way" every few blocks, I only invite them to worry and put an accidental burden on them to try and double-check my navigation. To me, that is inconsiderate. If I am all "this way, friends!" they can just trust me and chat about dogs or plywood manufacturing. A risk of "whoopsie, we need to loop around this block" is perfectly fine by most people.

[–] fluke@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Exactly. It depends on the severity of the negative outcome.

It's one thing to be confident in directions, it's another to be confident in a pre flight check list for a 737. That's why there's appropriate guidelines that dictate how to conduct the latter.

[–] Deestan@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Haha yes. If I ever overhear a pilot tell the other to "just be more confident" during pre-flight check, I'm getting the hell off that plane.