A free market is a distinct concept from a perfect market. You’re describing a perfect market operating under ideal conditions.

The free market is a theoretical model assuming perfectly rational actors acting on perfect information and it is indeed ideal within those assumptions. The issue is that it's not realistic. Real-world markets can be brought closer to the free market ideal by regulation. Don't let those laissez-faire fucks confuse you what they're peddling, by equivocation, is unregulated markets which are the complete opposite of free, what they want is institutionalised market failure.

Next time a "free market advocate" shows up on your doorstep, tell them to give you all their trade secrets so that you have better information about everything, it's what they want, after all.

I dunno, maybe they changed the terminology since I took it. Seems to me "free market" was not previously imbued with all that meaning you guys are reading into it. I'm not convinced it isn't just an Americanism. To me a "free market" is simply one that's substantially free of distortion, resembling to a notable extent a perfect market. But I'll certainly avoid the phrase in future.