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submitted 10 months ago by Bebo@literature.cafe to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

It was sometime in early 2022 that I found myself reading a few romance novels. I remember being mildly annoyed about how most of the books had instant chemistry/attraction as part of the plot. Then I suddenly found myself wondering, how do I feel if and when I feel attraction? I think I have probably never felt instant attraction. When I look at a good looking man/woman I just feel an appreciation for their beauty, like how I would feel looking at a beautiful painting or photograph. At most all I feel is a wish is to look at them a few times more than is appropriate. I don’t remember how it feels like to feel attraction towards someone I have feelings for. The last time I felt strong feelings for someone was many years ago and I can’t recall my feelings now. I am very curious to know how other people feel when they experience attraction towards someone. How does it feel physically, and what thoughts and/or feelings do you experience? Also, do you consider chemistry and attraction to be the same or different? How?

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[-] dingus@lemmy.world 5 points 10 months ago

OP, do you date? I'm similar to you in that I can't really feel attraction that way. I tried dating once forever ago and it just felt like I was lying to the other person because I couldn't feel the same way. So I never tried since. But sometimes things get lonely.

So I've wondered if it would be beneficial or not for someone like us to date.

[-] Bebo@literature.cafe 2 points 10 months ago

I tried for a short while then gave up. As of now don't find it beneficial really.

this post was submitted on 20 Nov 2023
75 points (97.5% liked)

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