1006
submitted 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) by MacNCheezus@lemmy.today to c/lemmybewholesome@lemmy.world
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[-] c0mbatbag3l@lemmy.world 25 points 7 months ago

Yeah I've heard some women I've dated complain about men not being honest with their feelings and then when one is suddenly they "have the ick" like, seriously? Just be consistent. Don't tell me to be open and then when I tell you about my fears and worries act like I'm a pussy for not being able to handle it myself. I could have, but you wanted it this way and now you're not attracted to me anymore.

Speaking from the male perspective, I've struggled with this as well. Sometimes it seems being tacit is "rewarded" by esteem.

So firstly, that is a sign that your partner may not be the one for you. But secondly, many of us men do not know how to communicate our emotions very well. We tend to think a breakdown is communication, when that's just as explosion - a loss of control, maybe because the actual emotional communication didn't come soon enough.

I fared a lot better after I payed attention to how women navigate this stuff amongst themselves. They often go back and forth very rapidly with tiny emotionally charged statements, and do lots of following up and outreach. Sometimes they'll do nice stuff for each other that doesn't make sense until you realise it's tied to some other thing.

Lots of multidimensional supporting and being supported going back. And if it's not going both ways, or the sines aren't syncing, then that just means that particular relationship is not 10/10 and that's ok.

[-] lightnsfw@reddthat.com 7 points 7 months ago

Yeah, every time I've allowed myself to be emotionally vulnerable with a woman I was dating it was like a switch flipped on her attraction to me. Nothing was the same after that and I'd much prefer to have sex regularly than have a shoulder to cry on, so I won't be doing that again. Whenever I mention that I always get told "you're just dating the wrong people". Which, ok maybe, but I've never exactly had options lining up around the block.

this post was submitted on 24 Jan 2024
1006 points (97.1% liked)

Lemmy Be Wholesome

6573 readers
329 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Be Wholesome. This is the polar opposite of LemmeShitpost. Here you can post wholesome memes, palate cleanser and good vibes.

The home to heal your soul. No bleak-posting!

Rules:


1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means: -No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. No NSFW Content


-Content shouldn't be NSFW

-Refrain from posting triggering content, if the content might be triggering try putting it behind NSFW tags.


7. Content should be Wholesome, we accept cute cats, kittens, puppies, dogs and anything, everything that restores your faith in humanity!


Content that isn't wholesome will be removed.

...


8. Reposting of Reddit content is permitted, try to credit the OC.


-Please consider crediting the OC when reposting content. A name of the user or a link to the original post is sufficient.

...


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Lemmy Review

2.Mildly Infuriating

3.Lemmy Shitpost

4.No Stupid Questions

5.You Should Know

6.Jokes

7.Credible Defense

...

Reach out to LillianVS for inclusion on the sidebar.

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS