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Advice on finding a partner? (lemm.ee)

submitted 6 months ago by lemmylem@lemm.ee to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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I just got ghosted by the girl I was talking to, I want to find another girl to talk to. This girl and I met at the gym, but I don't want to be the guy that goes to the gym just to meet girls. I mean sure there's the bar and Tinder, but I want a real relationship. I mean, I guess it'll come to me.

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[–] lemmylem@lemm.ee 4 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

The healthiest relationships stem from natural friendships because you build up a base of stuff in common and have a lot of trust before you ever make the jump to "do you wanna go out with me?"

See, that's where I fucked up. My dumbass texted her at 12AM and asked if she wanted to hang out the next day (She's usually up around that time, we both goto the gym around 11PM, which is why I thought it was okay). But we had only talked around 4-5 times, each conversation we had was good, but when it comes to texting, I fail miserably there. I think I just got too excited to meet her, and was a bit too forward. I completely messed up. Well, now I know not to do that again at least, lesson learned :(

[–] Wahots@pawb.social 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It's okay, that's life! You have plenty of time to explore and make new friends. I really wouldn't sweat the small stuff. You can probably text her at a reasonable hour with a different invite, and she might respond. I wouldn't put too fine a point on making a date out of it, though. Just be friends for a bit first, no strings attached.

Plus...it's kinda good to have mixed gender friends anyways, even if you aren't dating. Gives you fresh perspectives and better advice. :D

[–] lemmylem@lemm.ee 3 points 6 months ago

Yeah, she's gone lol, I mean I'm 20 and she was 29 with a 9 year old kid and that's not really what I want in a relationship. But oh my god she was easily the most attractive girl I've ever talked to, both in terms of looks and personality.