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Anon is stuck in a rut
(sh.itjust.works)
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this post was submitted on 07 Jun 2024
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Agree on the taking care of the place full time job piece! My partner and I are just starting to think about kids, and are most worried about the extra work in making sure things stay clean enough to be safe.
Granted, I've had a whole lot of health issues (just completed surgery 5/5 in the last 5 years) so a lot of home maintenance fell by the wayside. We're also both full time (42 hours minimum) and on top of that I have at least 4 medical appointments weekly still, so we are just in the process of getting a system going.
Thank you for sharing what works for you!
Oh wow yeah that sounds like a hand full. Health becomes a problem for us. If one of us gets sick for a few days it gets pretty rough. We don't have too much time to go out, and my wife and I haven't really went on too many dates since our 3rd was born. But we're both on the same page that it's part of the season we're in. I'm busy maybe 3 days a week and that already makes it rough, but I can't imagine if my week was full of appointments.
Don't worry about being too clean for the kids. The first one is always going to be the learning curve, and we've been there with the ultra clean everything. Germs and chokeables. Now on our 3rd we're a lot more lax, being more observant when it's necessary. But you will drive yourself crazy picking every speck off the ground lol.
But ultimately my wife and I are a team. And if there's anything that becomes too hard for us it's because we weren't on the same page about it. Life moves forward. Children are the best thing that ever happened to us. And our hobbies didn't disappear, we got new ones and old ones either aren't interesting anymore or adapted to fit. You'll never be 100% ready. If you and your partner want children, let that child grow with you.