this post was submitted on 21 Aug 2024
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Every once in a while I get a Uline catalog sent to me.I have looked at that same sort of industrial Jumbo roll. Very tempting.
If it's the uline jumbo rolls my work gets... Please don't.
Your asshole will thank me
You just gotta keep using it until your anus naturally builds up callouses.
I rarely physically shudder from text
My wife keeps telling me that...
Why? What is she planning for your anus that requires callouses? You should inquire. That sounds suspicious!
Just know that she won't answer and I'm scared.
Do you need us to call someone for you?
Sounds exciting!
I too try to only shit on company time
They're called union shits around here. Even if you're not in one lol.
Also combine shitty to with expensive bidet. Best of both worlds.
If you don't use a bidet, your butthole is already calloused. I learned this the first time I pooped in a normal toilet after getting my bidet.
I think this is the worst thing I've ever read
Thank you, and you're welcome.
What a terrible day to have eyes.
Is it the high gloss stuff, or the 80 grit option?
Does it flake like a French pastry?
I only wipe my ass with croissants to keep my cheeks buttery smooth
I'm fairly certain those words have never been uttered in that order in the entirety of human history. Bravo.
Nor should they ever again.
It's a terrible day for Canada, and therefore the world
The toilet paper or his asscheeks?
My old work ordered everything from uline, and I started bringing in my own TP specifically because of how awful it is to use that tissue paper.
Legitimately feels like tissue paper that people stuff gift bags with.
But at the same time, almost slippery.
And you WILL know if you creased the paper the wrong way, because it WILL stab at you with the force of ten thousand teeny tiny needles.
Plus side, it's basically impossible to clog your toilet with that stuff. It's effectively pipe grease.
Try a bidet first. I still use TP to dry off the wet, but way less TP.
How much TP did you use to use? I'm usually in the 2-4 squares range, which is usually enough to get a clean wipe. I imagine I'd still be in that range w/ a bidet, I'd just be a bit cleaner. My trick is to buy non-crappy TP, so I don't need to double up (Costco brand is the perfect mix of strong and cheap).