lol! I used to think that everyone was acting normal in public, but really everyone was stereotypically autistic in private. Nope. Turns out that I'm stereotypically autistic in private and act normal in public, while everyone else is just normal all the time.

NTs are not acting like they're interested in the weather. It's their cultural form of building social connections and assessing whether they want to get closer with said person. Also helps some of them be comfortable because they have difficulty with silence, as if something were wrong if no one was talking.

[–] ibt3321@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

As a person without autism but with ADHD it's fascinating how half of the traits I relate to but half of them are completely off

[–] yogurtwrong@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

I have both and it's absolutely wild when you have one side which hates order and needs constant chaos and an other side which needs strict rules and order

[–] BackOnMyBS@lemmy.autism.place 2 points 2 months ago

Exactly! I get the obsession over a special interest, but overlook major aspects. For example, when I was in middle school, we had an assignment in which we were given certain materials and instructed to build a craft that can protect an egg from breaking when dropped from a 2nd floor (20-25ft; 6-8m). I created an elaborate system that had two forms of suspension that even impressed the teacher. I was certain this would work. When it came time to test it out, I completely did not account for the craft flipping upside down because I was so focused on the cushioning that nothing else existed. The thing flipped and the egg practically hit the ground directly. Oof. I might as well have just thrown the bare egg at the floor.

Another thing I have done several times is to prepare to make a delicious meal. I will run through the entire recipe noting all the ingredients. My list will be divided by the aisle in which they are located at the grocery store. I plan the entire timeline backwards to make sure everything is completed on time. I go to the store and make sure I get everything per my list. Finally, I go pay and walk out, completely forgetting all of the food items I just purchased! I have done this at least 10 times.

Or more embarrassingly, I was invited to a fancy-pants formal event across the country. I ask about attire, what my expected behaviors are (e.g. giving a speech, spending time with certain attendants, etc.), schedule, where I will be staying...everything. I make an elaborate packing list with backups for things that are essential. Once I get there and just a few hours before the event, I go to get my suit and realize I forgot it on my bed at home all packed and ready to go.

My life is littered with examples like these: going overboard into something while completely overlooking a detrimental component. It's a bit shame inducing, so I get discouraged. It really helps to have helpful people around though. I seem to be much more effective in small caring and respectful teams with overlapping roles and responsibilities.

The End

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 2 months ago

blessedly to some degree i've got it such that they somewhat counteract each other, my memory is absolute dogshit but i can spend a fair bit of time figuring out a good way to organize things such that i don't need to remember things.