this post was submitted on 07 Jun 2024
120 points (75.9% liked)

Greentext

4460 readers
1124 users here now

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works
120
Anon is metal as fuck (lemmy.world)
submitted 5 months ago by RedditEnjoyer@lemmy.world to c/greentext@sh.itjust.works
21 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 
all 22 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] dogsnest@lemmy.world 145 points 5 months ago (4 children)

My testicles retreated into my body upon reading that. They're afraid to come out.

[–] Bombastic@sopuli.xyz 57 points 5 months ago (2 children)

I'm in your walls and I brought my scissors with me. You sleep soundly.

Snip snip

[–] loaExMachina@sh.itjust.works 16 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

Nah, it's like with garlic. There are many ways to cut, but what really brings out the flavour is if you crush it. Which is why I'm in the ceiling with my hammer.

Whomp whomp

[–] brown567@sh.itjust.works 4 points 5 months ago

Reading this made a sound in my head

Not a crushing sound, just the scream that would come with it

I'm scared XD

[–] r_thndr@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 5 months ago

Jesus Harold Christ what the goddamned fuck

[–] Land_Strider@lemmy.world 1 points 5 months ago

You zhink we are making with the funny jokes, Labowski?

[–] prettybunnys@sh.itjust.works 18 points 5 months ago

You and me both brother

[–] Starkstruck@lemmy.world 4 points 5 months ago

I don't even have balls yet I felt some sort of phantom pain reading this.

[–] tkk13909@sopuli.xyz 90 points 5 months ago

What the fuck do not do this

[–] confusedbytheBasics@lemmy.world 57 points 5 months ago

I know at least one dude who's parents caught him trying to cut off his balls with garden sheers when he was young in the 90s. They stopped him and he went on to play football and marry a woman and all the stuff his folks wanted. I wonder how he's doing now.

[–] AlexisFR@jlai.lu 54 points 5 months ago (1 children)

That has totally happened.

[–] Akasazh@feddit.nl 18 points 5 months ago

But it is in the internet!

[–] qooqie@lemmy.world 42 points 5 months ago

Big fucking cap, you would immediately be known after you as a young kid screamed after even breaching the skin

[–] BluesF@lemmy.world 41 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Jesus Christ I may have dysphoria but I don't have thatphoria

[–] RVGamer06@sh.itjust.works 7 points 5 months ago

ba dum tsss

[–] Titou@sh.itjust.works 6 points 5 months ago (3 children)

Currently 18 and will start HRT this month, why should we transition before 25 ?

[–] jol@discuss.tchncs.de 35 points 5 months ago

After 25, the balls grow permanent roots into your brain and it's impossible to sniidy snip then.

[–] nxdefiant@startrek.website 31 points 5 months ago

Get medical advice from a doctor, not a green text by a person who scissored their balls off in a hospital bathroom.

[–] SirHenry@feddit.de 13 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I think because your body i still developing and can adpt to the changes way better.

[–] Titou@sh.itjust.works 3 points 5 months ago

Oh ok, i've heard about it, but more in a teenager context, also can't wait to be under hrt too