EsheLynn

joined 2 years ago
[–] EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 8 months ago

It's been a year and I still deadname myself when I am frustrated. You'll get there! It was such a good moment for me when the gendered language flipped in my head and started saying some things "right"(like how I wanted to be a voice actress instead of a voice actor). You've been calling yourself a guy for as long as you can remember, and it's all new(ish)! Give yourself grace!

[–] EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 8 months ago (1 children)

As a minneapolite, I would have to recommend Minneapolis! I've seen very little in the way of transphobia, I love my doctors, my kids like their doctors, they like their schools, all in all, moving to Minnesota was the best decision I've made!

[–] EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 8 months ago

Unfortunately, it's quite hard to expat from the US. I've looked into it myself, and, basically, if you aren't some kind of skilled labor, good luck.

[–] EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 year ago

Honey, this is your depression acting up again. Talk to your therapist, please. We can't give you the help you need. You are beautiful and loved, and please, take some time for self care. It does wonders for ones mental health.

[–] EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

And what does that mean?

[–] EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

In lay terms, without referring to graphics, what does that mean? ELI5, please? People keep saying left and right like it means something.

[–] EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 year ago

The circus is the US. The ringmaster is in DC. We all live in the circus, surrounded by clowns and lions, but if you set the tarp on fire, we all burn. We need a new circus.

[–] EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 year ago (7 children)

And yet, it wasn't explained how Democrats are conservatives, whatever that means. I just hear Republicans are conservative, now this one rando is saying Dems are conservative, what does that even mean, anymore? What does democrat or republican mean if they are being accused of being the same? How are they the same?

[–] EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 1 year ago (10 children)

Elaborate, please? How are Democrats Republicans, and if they aren't, what is the difference? I genuinely don't understand.

[–] EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 year ago

Why? Shit floats.

[–] EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 36 points 1 year ago

While I consider dude a gender neutral term, if someone asked me to stop calling them dude, I would, as it is respectful to them.

 

I just wanted to share that you don't have to be "traditionally beautiful" to be considered a woman. I am a woman. I am aware I don't conform to society's vision of a woman. But I am a woman.

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Love vs Support (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) by EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone
 

TW: (perceived?) Transphobia

So. I had a shit day yesterday. Doomscrolling my home page on YouTube and found a short. I commented on the author, cuz he seems like he thinks hes some kind of parasocial psychology expert or something, cuz I thought I could give my perspective on my recent transition journey and be met with intelligent discourse.

All I was met with is some variation of "poor wife" or "you aren't telling the whole story." Then the invasion of the shitheels that have been spouting transphobic nonsense here.

Tried to take a bath today to reset my brain. (I get baths now. It's kinda like meditation for me.) I didn't have any tops I felt comfortable wearing, so I went to the thrift store and found.... Nothing.

"How does this relate to the title?" you find yourself asking. Well, if you remember, I made a post the other day about seeing my mom. About thinking it went well.

I asked today if at some point in the future, she would help me learn makeup and nails and whatever.

I think you're confusing with me loving you and accepting this. I'm not supporting this decision

What The Fuck.

The one other person I thought I could go to for help, other than my ex, and I get rejected, again?

I just feel so isolated. I have no female role models to try to help me be myself, no trusted women in my life. Tried going on nextdoor and introducing myself in a gay group, cuz I wanted to try to be involved with my local LGBT group, and was met with "okay, but are you gay?" Even tho I laid out I was trans in my intro post. I guess it was gay in the guys looking for guys sense, not a homosexual support/ friend network like I thought.

I've got an appointment with my social worker (mental health) on the seventh, but this week has got me so fucked up.

I don't want my kids to help me, and I don't know why. I guess it's just my parental mental block, that I'm supposed to take care of them, not the other way around? I just wanted a woman I love and support to love and support me. To learn from the masters haha. I guess I gotta watch YouTube tutorials and ask strangers for fashion advice I guess? Instead of getting personal care from people I thought cared?

 

When I talk to myself, sometimes I call myself my dead name, or my gender I don't associate myself with. I am self-aware enough to know I've associated myself as male and [name] for thirty-seven years, but it annoys me I haven't made that connection in my brain somewhere that yes, I'm a girl, my name is Eshe. I feel it in my soul, so why is my brain being such an ass?

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