Kind of disagree. The design is actually really simple and cleverly looks like just a fin when small enough
limitedduck
Social skills, as the name implies, are meant to be trained, maintained, and expanded over a lifetime so don't discount yourself because you feel like you're too old or have tried and failed for too long. Have you considered seeking behavioral therapy? Perhaps you're not picking up on the myriad non-verbal social cues that could help you better inform your conversations. Behavioral therapy can help identify where you're lacking and give you the opportunity to practice skills and receive feedback from a professional.
I sincerely wish you the best of luck.
You don't need to give explicit details of your coworkers' lives, but from your writing it really seemed to me that you were more interested in mechanically optimizing conversation. This isn't necessarily a bad perspective, but people already do that organically by understanding each other more and learning their history. The route of good conversation follows logically from there through empathy.
In school I had a physics teacher who thought it was a good idea one day to use whiteboard markers on the glass windows instead of the whiteboard. I didn't learn anything that lesson.