I'm very open to discuss my beliefs but you have to ask instead of insult.

Have you ever considered that I do believe in a literal Jesus that lived and died. My personal interpretation is God an nth dimensional being fires up the sim known as our universe and has fun designing spacetime and life in our sim for a few billion years. Eventually he gets bored and wants more interactive NPCs. So then God decided to impart sapience via further evolution to our human ancestors. He gets frustrated with the NPCs and their weird primate behaviors and tries to do the authority figure bit, it fails. Makes a new plan become part human and live as a human to understand our perspective better. Immediately realizes how fucked his creation is once it is able to be experienced in our time based chemistry driven existence and absolves the whole sin thing.