this post was submitted on 11 Dec 2023
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I don't blame people for not going to church. They don't even give you wine anymore, just grape juice. Jesus drank wine, why can't I?
I thought Jesus was wine or something like that? I've never participated in Christianity's cannibalistic rituals though, so I'm sure I'm a bit confused.
the wine only becomes Jesus' blood in your tummy unless you have an operation or autopsy then it turns back into wine just in the nick of time, apparently.
It's only cannibalism if you believe you are the same as God.
Arise, God-drinkers.
For mormons it's just water :(
Mormons had to mix mayonnaise into their ketchup when it first got introduced to Utah, because ketchup was too spicy. Mormons are bitches.
Lmao don't bring fry sauce into this!
Jesus tasted the private jet life and doesn't visit pastors without one anymore, so they need to save up for one, hence the budget cuts in your wine.