Does everyone at your office onboard 2 days out of the week, every week?

Maybe it depends on what kind of employees you are onboarding, but in tech it's vastly simpler to onboard employees remotely, you want to be sharing screens so even if you were in an office you'd want to be at your own computers.

My team onboards people remotely no problem. I'd argue it's better than trying to see what someone is doing over their shoulder.

I had my work stuff shipped across the country to me. No in-person onboarding required

This simply isn't true.

I agree onboarding is a bad example, I think the social part is better face-to-face. I can understand that not everyone needs that in their job.