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submitted 11 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) by kescusay@lemmy.world to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world

We've been getting some weird posts lately that... Well, they're not making me think it's gotta be an Onion headline, that's for sure.

So just a little refresher. Posts should be:

  1. Links to news stories from…
  2. …credible sources, with…
  3. …their original headlines, that…
  4. …would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

If it's not Onion-y, it doesn't belong here. Bizarre, horrific, and violent news can be here if the headline reads like something out of The Onion, but if it doesn't, it's going away. And if there's too much non-Onion-like content from an account, that account is going away, too.

If you're not sure whether the real news headline you've found is like The Onion, here's a few sample Onion headlines from today:

  • "Visiting Friend Pleasantly Surprised By City’s Open Hostility Toward Homeless People"
  • "Increasingly Powerful Trans Person Capable Of Using Every Single Bathroom At Once"
  • "Man Feels Like Bystanders Are Arguing For Him To Put Gun Down In Bad Faith"
  • "Wally The Emotional Support Alligator Went To See The Phillies"
  • ‘New York Times’ Issues Apology For Reporting Palestinian Deaths

See? Find headlines from real news outlets that remind you of headlines like those. And just to prove my point: One of them is real.

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cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/19430855

Tim Pool, Dave Rubin and Benny Johnson addressed allegations that a company they were associated with had been paid to publish videos with messages in favour of Russia

A number of high-profile, conservative influencers in the US have said they are “victims” of an alleged Russian disinformation campaign, after the Biden administration accused Moscow of carrying out a sustained campaign to influence the outcome of November’s presidential elections.

Tim Pool, Dave Rubin and Benny Johnson published statements on Wednesday evening addressing allegations that a US content creation company they were associated with had been provided with nearly $10m from Russian state media employees to publish videos with messages in favour of Moscow’s interests and agenda, including over the war in Ukraine.

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“It’s September, and it already smells like Christmas,” Nicolás Maduro said Monday night during his weekly television show.

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Maduro declared, “This year and to honor you all... I am going to decree the beginning of Christmas on October 1.”

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An Italian man has said he kept his dead mother’s remains in a freezer to cover up her death and continue to collect her pension.

Sandro Mallus told police he put the body of Rosanna Pilloni, 78, in the family’s chest freezer after she passed away at home in the small town of Sarroch, near Cagliari in Sardinia, in January last year.

He made the admission after police began investigating concerns from neighbours that the woman hadn’t been seen for months.

According to local media, Mr Mallus continued shopping as if he was buying for two people, maintaining the pretence that his mother was alive.

Police are due to carry out a post mortem examination on Monday and have not ruled out the possibility Pilloni was killed, something Mr Mallus denies.

“My mother died of natural causes,’’ Mr Mallus told the newspaper, L’Unione Sarda. “I would never have harmed her.

“When I discovered her body I was desperate. I had no money for the funeral, so I locked her in there.”

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submitted 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) by hellfire103@lemmy.ca to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world
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Yoshinoya Holdings Co. is hoping that its customers don't bury their heads in the sand but give a new exotic meat offering on the menu a try.

The operator of the popular “gyudon” beef bowl chain announced on Aug. 28 that it has begun offering an ostrich rice bowl.

Ostrich is known for its high-protein, low-fat and low-calorie meat.

Yoshinoya is positioning ostrich as its fourth meat offering, following beef, pork and chicken.

The company said this is also part of its effort to diversify ingredients and continue offering healthy and satisfying meals.

As a first step, the bowl with thigh and fillet ostrich meat prepared in a roast beef style on rice is being sold at around 400 of Yoshinoya’s cafe-style stores, called “Cooking and Comfort,” across the country.

The dish is priced at 1,683 yen ($11.60) including tax.

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cross-posted from: https://lemmy.ml/post/19720479

“I have spent my career inviting diversity of opinion. I think it’s important to have people at the table when some of the most important decisions are being made that have different views, different experiences,” Harris said. “And I think it would be to the benefit of the American public to have a member of my Cabinet who was a Republican.”

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An Austrian surgeon allegedly let his teenage daughter drill a hole in a patient's skull.

Following a forestry accident in January, a 33-year-old man was flown by air ambulance to Graz University Hospital, Styria, southeastern Austria, with serious head injuries, according to Kronen Zeitung, an Austrian newspaper.

He needed emergency surgery, but the doctor allegedly let his 13-year-old daughter take part in operating on him.

The newspaper reported that she even drilled a hole in the patient's skull.

While the operation was said to have gone off without issue, the patient is still unable to work and investigations by the Graz public prosecutor's officer against the entire surgical team are continuing.

It wasn't until April that an anonymous complaint was logged to the public prosecutor's office about the allegations, the newspaper reported.

The alleged victim initially learned about the case in the media before later being told by authorities he was a witness in an investigation.

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Not The Onion

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Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

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Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

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