"Ketamine: Negative" lol.
this post was submitted on 17 Jun 2025
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Does this mean that Musk's address is stored on Fastest Lab's servers?
Edit: nvm I found his address
These drug tests are as legit as those solar roof panels he was showing
Drugs deserve better than to be associated with elon. I won't let him ruin ketamine for the children.
There is an addendum:
Creatine: normal
weak baby, gotta get GAINS
If he has not enough computer skills to fake such a document, he probably has someone who can. Just like has people playing games for him.
Oh great, a screenshot posted by the guy known to pay people to pretend to be him being good at games, who has spent the last few years— damn I mean the last few months, trying to see whether he can set the bar higher for destroying net worth or the lives of uncountable people all over the world.
Can we overlook the potential fact that he's not on drugs and focus on him admitting that he acts the way he acts WITHOUT drugs as an excuse?
Fr is the crazy all natty
So he's like Beavis and Butt-Head. Even when they drink non-alcoholic beer they still act drunker than most drunks.
the shithead smoked pot on a podcast, and he expects people to believe this?
I once saw someone try to say he didn’t inhale as a defense for him. What the fuck is wrong with people trying to defend this fucking nazi.
Do you think a person who smoked pot on a podcast is unable to pass a drug screening in the future?
No, and I didn’t say that.
No, but they aren't drug free either. There is literally evidence for that.
How can he expect us to believe this when his blood isn't even on the blockchain?
Like when Fox News got their hands on 40,000 hours of January 6 footage, and edited a 2 minute montage of people being not committing mayhem, and then used that carefully edited clip to claim the allegations of violence were liberal lies.
Grok, how long does it take for all the drugs in this report to clear your system?
I think cannabis is the only one that would take longer than maybe 10-14 days (heavy use of ketamine would take a little longer than the usual few days).
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So we’re just supposed to believe that the richest man on earth can’t just make up a form, pay wm employee for clean urine, or just pay off the doctor
Piss test catches ket for a week. A hair test catches it for a year. Something to think on.
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Until i personally test his hair for ketamine I'm not going to be convinced. I used to know a lot of crusties. I know what it looks like when someone's in a k hole.
You mean the hair that was implanted?
You don't need to use head hair. But it'd still pick it up , because it needs a blood supply to grow even if it's implanted.
We once tested hair for mineral content in one of my lab classes. Because I had a full beard at the time, the lab tech said it would be interesting if I tested my beard hair. Mine came back with way more sodium and potassium than the other samples. It was only later that I realised this was from eating pussy right before class. Good times.
Lmao, reminds me of this Chinese phrase "此地無銀三百兩" (There are no 300 taels of silver buried here)
It is said to come from a story about a man named Zhang San (張三). According to the story, he buried 300 taels of silver in the ground with the banner “There are no 300 taels of silver (buried) here” so that no one would steal them. But his neighbor Wang Er (王二) saw through the lie and dug up the money, leaving the banner “Your neighbour Wang Er did not steal (the silver)”.
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They test for "ecstacy", the street name, not "MDMA" the official name? Where did he get these test results from, his dealer?
Opiates are tested, and oxycodone? But oxycodone is an opiate. Is this list created by chatgpt?
It says it was a urine sample. As if the richest man in the world cannot get a clean urine sample from someone. It's probably from the only kid he gives attention (to block snipers when he's out in the open). That's probably why the kid punched him in the face. Because daddy wanted to touch his pipi.
So I'm familiar with this organization for reasons.
USDTL itself is the real deal. Not a drug testing expert, but it's probable the assay used flags positive for Ecstasy in the presence of either MDMA and/or MDMA metabolites like MDA. Like the guy below you said, it's also common to separate out oxy from opiates - an opiate screen from this lab detects codeine, hydrocodone, hydromorphone, and morphine. The oxy screen flags positive in the presence of oxycodone and oxymorphone.
None of this is to say it's actually Elon's urine, though - I'd usually give USDTL the benefit of the doubt re: chain of custody, but the guy has too much money and brainwashees to totally rule out this being an unsupervised collection where someone else's pee was swapped in. Send me an uncut video of a hair collection, with the specimen id clearly marked and everything packaged up to forensic standards on camera, and I might have less doubt.
At least in that case, any fuckery after the fact is a great way to lose CAP accreditation.
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Where do you think he got the pee?
Since this is Elon we're talking about, I figure his kid/bodyarmor.
one of his wage slaves forced to work on threat of their visa getting nullified
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Half of those literally only show up if you're on them when you get the test lol
I really don't care, but if we're playing this game, could we get a hair test?
... People constantly say he's on drugs. This is such a dumb post lol
Also yes he's on drugs that report is clearly bs
If the claim is that his obnoxious behaviour is nothing to do with his drug habit, I'm prepared to accept that.
"I swear it's not drugs, I am just a giant asshole completely naturally!"
Well I for one am perfectly convinced that patient TX45788288 is clean and free of drugs. Of course, I don't really know who that is. Probably isn't Musk though. Even if it is, I'm quite sure that he could easily find someone to piss in a cup for him for a million or so. Hell, I hate the dirt bag and I would have done it for a million bucks.
Also, I would never impute the integrity of Jennifer Taylor of Fastest Labs of South Austin, but I think maybe her boss should check to see if she suddenly jumped into a new tax bracket.
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always great to see urine test results from a troglodyte who probably cannot physically even urinate properly
Because of his mangled dick?
yes
It's obviously impossible that could be faked. I mean an image of a text document? There's no way!
Mere emojis are insufficient to convey how much I'm rolling my eyes.
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