No Stupid Questions

Idk, I feel like an adult. That's not to say I have everything figured out, but I've thought a lot about who I want to be, have done (and continue to do) a lot to get closer to being that person and keep growing, and I've successfully navigated a variety of situations and feel confident in my ability to handle unexpected circumstances going forward. I also have a lot of autonomy and when I want something I can usually figure it out or make it happen

Not trying to brag, this probably comes across that way but idk how else to put it 😅

Imposter syndrome

Sure. I mean, I am a adult. I never thought adults had things figured out when I was a kid either, seemed pretty obvious they were just trying their best with what they had to work with.

Yes. I'm 43, married to my college sweetheart, we have three boys, a house in the suburbs, own a business, take care of my family, and am responsible for everything. Becoming completely independent of any outside help is part of it. Having others that depend on you to handle anything that comes along is the next part. Becoming an adult isn't a switch, it's a gradient. Having kids definitely catapults you along, though. I don't know how grown up I would be right now if I were unmarried and childless, but I'm guessing less so. Above all else, becoming responsible for an entire family is the thing that did it for me, and even that was a gradient.

Hell no. I'm 29 with my own house, six-figure job, and 3 cars and I don't feel like an adult lol. But also no kids nor desire to have kids will do that

Same. I sometimes really feel like I'm faking it.

This question is what an adult feels like.

Sometimes when I'm hanging my laundry. God, that makes me feels so adulty

@return2ozma@lemmy.world it is always like this https://i.pinimg.com/originals/38/cb/57/38cb5784e54f1217cf168c64689b1133.gif

Only when I land slightly wrong or too hard and think my knees are about to explode

Oh, and the forced grunt every time I stand up

Yeah kinda. To me being a kid is all about the feeling of things not being up to you, you don't make the real decisions and the ones you do get to make are inconsequential. The past doesn't weigh on you and the future is a wide open mystery. Doesn't feel like that anymore.

Nope.

Still just feel like a kid, with extra responsibilities, while raising my own kids. Guess sometime around 50 or so i'll start feeling like an "adult"

Although, at least I call myself a dumbass, after doing something stupid, or wasting money on crap.

People who act like adults are merely pretending.

I feel like I'm pretending to know what I'm doing.

I guess that explains the observation. As kids, we're fooled by the pretenders. So we grow up with this expectation.

Yeah, I do. I got bills to pay, mouths to feed, a job to go to, joints that hurt…yep. I event grunt when I get up.

I guess I was never under the impression that any adult actually knew what they were doing, even when I was younger, so I wasn’t surprised that I am still constantly improvising. This is the natural state of living. You’re either learning and improving, or you’re becoming obsolete and decaying. This is true whether or not you’re an adult.

The feeling that you have no idea what you're doing and just winging it is the most adult thing ever.

I make okay money in my forties, was able to put a large some down on a reasonable new car to keep monthly payments low. Also my back hurts if I sit too long. So, yes.

There are tasks and chores my parents used to do on my behalf that I now do myself, like making money, paying taxes, handling health insurance, etc. I guess those make me feel like an adult.

But then there are milestones I thought I would have hit by now that I have not, mainly concerning family life. No kids, no partner, nobody to take care of but myself. If I wanna go out and party, or stay in and play video games all weekend, there's not really much to stop me. That makes me feel immature.

If I think about it, yeah. I have a good career, a wife, a cat, a house. It just happened so gradually that I didn't notice it while it was happening.

Every time I have to confiscate the book my kid is reading after lights out I feel like an adult.

The rest of the time... fuck no.

(They get it back in the morning -- I'm not a monster!)

I feel like an actual adult when I achieve milestones of my own character.

Any kid can be dragged through the external milestones of an adult life. But a kid cannot experience the milestones of adult character development, because those are the things that define adulthood.

For example yesterday toward the end of my work day, I had the opportunity to just coast through the last hour. It’s a skill I’ve developed, so I know I can do it. But instead I pushed myself to get more done and keep what promises I could to my customers, despite not feeling like it. That is the kind of thing that makes me feel like an adult. No amount of having experienced relationships, earning, owning, or exposure to death and suffering does it to me. But pushing myself to fulfill my duty despite not feeling like it, makes me feel like an actual adult.

I had to borrow money from the bank this year to buy a car. That made me feel too adult and kind of drove me into a crisis.

Yes but it is not get a job or have a kid: it is because i have sustained previously unimaginable loss yet keep going. that is the feeling of adult to me.

I started feeling like an adult when I was 28. Throughout my 20s the thought came up every so often but I distinctly remember the first time it happened and I really did feel like an adult was when I was 28.

Yeah. Life is almost exclusively chores and dealing with bureaucracy. Can't get much more adult than that.

I'm middle aged and play video games and even do a lot of stuff like HTB as if I'm 20 about to embark on a new career path at any minute

I don’t feel like I know what I’m doing but I do feel like an adult. The two are a bit separate in my head.

I'm in my 40s and married with a kid and I'll be the first to admit that I'm winging it. We're all just that same little kid we were but in an adult body trying to figure out the world. I did get called sir by a younger co-worker and I made them swear to never say it again. Just call me dude or something lol

All, the, fucking, time.

I'm 27 and sometimes I don't feel like an adult. I don't have a job, I live with my parents (even though it's not as taboo here in my country), and I feel more like an older brother to my nephew instead of the uncle I really am.