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You all are harsh.
“A social butterfly is a slang term for a person who is socially dynamic, successful at networking, charismatic, and personally gregarious. Usually, social butterflies don't belong to a particular group, but rather jump from one group to another.” Wikipedia
Edit: Perhaps it doesn’t answer the question because it’s not a single word. It came to mind immediately though. Maybe start there and look for synonyms?
Hmm I think it's fine if someone is a social butterfly, they don't have bad intentions etc. I am talking about someone who seems like you can trust them but actually they have other loyalties, I live in a place where people get arrested for supporting democracy for example
If we're talking where consequences of their friendships get you thrown in jail, traitor is a pretty good word.
I heard them called "bats" because they flap around between different groups and are associated with darkness thus "shady"!
What about perfidious gadabout?
I think your focus is on the disloyalty, but really there are two aspects of your description that make it difficult to find s single word which fits well. I’m also thinking the individual isn’t necessarily disloyal, but rather loyal to an unseen cause. E.g., disingenuous. If the person is a plant, then “mole” comes to mind.
In the USA, one term we have for this kind of person is “poseur”.
I'd call them normal. What kind of psychopath has multiple friend groups, but is only "loyal" to one of them?
Or counter to that...
Cautious? I've known plenty of people who had just been hurt by past friendships, so they were cautious about putting themselves out there too much for fear of getting hurt.
Such a weird concept - you don't trust someone who has a wide variety of friends? I have several very different hobbies/activities, so naturally there's little overlap in my friend groups. Most of my friends are like this - for example one belongs to three choirs and I don't know any of those friends. Or her kayaking friends, or her work friends. I'm giggling thinking how baffled she'd be if I started questioning her "loyalty". Even my very closest friends have other friend groups I'm not part of. So what?
no, it's normal to have a variety of friends
i'm talking about people with loyalty to a specific ideology and they are not honest about who they are in contact with, i live in asia in an area where you can get in a lot of trouble if you support democracy and if you share such information with the wrong person you can get in a lot of trouble
Reminds me of a line from 'Catch-22.' I may have the wrong character name.
Orr would defend his Communist friends to his Fascist freinds and he would defend his Fascist friends to his Communist friends. No one ever defended Orr because he was too weird.
Orr would defend his Communist friends to his Fascist freinds and he would defend his Fascist friends to his Communist friends. No one ever defended Orr because he was too weird.
yes this is basically what I mean
In the book, the character was sincere. He really did try to see both sides and get along with people. It never seemed to work.
To answer the original question; a good term would be 'two-faced.' Someone who pretends to be a friend and then gossips about you with others.
'Wishy-washy' is a person who simply goes along with the majority without having strong opinions of their own.
I agree. I think 'two-faced' is the best i've seen based on OP's various comments in the thread.
Ooooh ok, in that context I can see what the issue is. That is such a heads-up for me in terms of making assumptions based on my own privilege, and I apologise for doing that here. I'm very lucky to be able to discuss politics without fear. I wish you all the best.
That is such a heads-up for me in terms of making assumptions based on my own privilege, and I apologise for doing that here. I’m very lucky to be able to discuss politics without fear.
it's ok, everyone has their own problems
my wording was maybe not clear
Free agent. Floater.
What about a "social climber"? Someone whose friendships are based on calculations about who can help them succeed in other ways?
Opportunist
Yeah, the good version of someone like that would be a diplomat, but the untrustworthy version is definitely an opportunist.
Social chameleon
That was my thought too
Is this person known to be friends with each group, by each group? Or are they trying to keep their connections hidden, as well?
A tag-along?
Duplicitous?
i learned a new word, thank you!
I know people who were Christians in Afghanistan, who were outed to the government (Taliban). The word they use is "spy". It may not be the normal, English use of the word, but it's the word that real-life people who have been on the receiving end of the betrayal use.
I know people who were Christians in Afghanistan, who were outed to the government (Taliban). The word they use is “spy”. It may not be the normal, English use of the word, but it’s the word that real-life people who have been on the receiving end of the betrayal use.
This is basically what i mean; someone who you can't fully trust about their allegiance.
That is really awful what happened to those people; are they ok now?
A mimic
Turncoat, two-faced, quisling, crony?
Fair-weather friend?
Wolf in sheep's clothing