this post was submitted on 25 Jun 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] NateNate60@lemmy.world 156 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Ah yes. How to get by without a job:

  • Fraud (false warranty claims)
  • Theft (stealing coins from vending machine)
  • Gambling (crypto)
  • Literally just self-employment (starting a drop shipping business/flipping things on eBay)
[–] pelletbucket@lemm.ee 19 points 5 months ago (2 children)

yeah you're only allowed to do those things if you have a net worth over 25 million

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[–] trafficnab@lemmy.ca 15 points 5 months ago

"Lifehack: Literally just steal"

[–] JohnDClay@sh.itjust.works 130 points 5 months ago (8 children)

Crypto trade

There's where all the money went I guess. Gotta steal toilet paper to leverage that crypto position. (After you've already lost everything several times)

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[–] Kowowow@lemmy.ca 81 points 5 months ago (2 children)

All this put together sounds like a job

[–] calcopiritus@lemmy.world 36 points 5 months ago

A less ethical, worse paid, more hours than a job.

[–] FrostyCaveman@lemm.ee 20 points 5 months ago

Yeah! I can’t be bothered with all this shit, I’ll just be a wagie instead.

[–] RandomGuy79@lemmy.world 58 points 5 months ago (2 children)

That seems like a lot of constant hustle to get out of having an actual job

[–] pelletbucket@lemm.ee 13 points 5 months ago (4 children)

it is legitimately better than having a real job though. I absolutely hate working for myself but working for somebody else is even worse

[–] curiousaur@reddthat.com 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Not when you make 100 times as much.

[–] Dyskolos@lemmy.zip 5 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

Who cares for the cash, the lost time hurts most. Jobs suck ass, even if they're mildly interesting. Could've pursued 5 hobbies instead of sitting in a stupid office doing stupid things for other people

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[–] Subverb@lemmy.world 46 points 5 months ago (7 children)

This is why companies have cheap toilet paper by the way. Not because they necessarily hate their employees, but because it would get stolen and they'd need three times as much.

Also one of the reasons why the huge rolls exist like you see at airports: impractical to use at home.

[–] nxdefiant@startrek.website 11 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I stole one of those huge rolls from college once. It dispenses just fine on the floor.

[–] Halosheep@lemm.ee 15 points 5 months ago (3 children)

Yeah but then you're wiping floor on your ass.

[–] Worx@lemmynsfw.com 13 points 5 months ago (1 children)

There is literal shit on my arse, what difference does some floor make?

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[–] AmosBurton_ThatGuy@lemmy.ca 4 points 5 months ago

Floor spice makes everything nice!

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 3 points 5 months ago

College, they've done worse to themself.

[–] pelletbucket@lemm.ee 7 points 5 months ago

I would steal it from the train when I was homeless

[–] Etterra@lemmy.world 3 points 5 months ago

Joke's on them, when I have to use cheap TP I have to use 3x as much because it's such cheap trash.

[–] BreadOven@lemmy.world 2 points 5 months ago

Depending on the bathroom, some universities have decent TP. I'd say research buildings that you don't need card access to get in. Most of those I've worked at seem to be decent.

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[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 42 points 5 months ago

Anon still calls mom and dad multiple times a month for money.

[–] SuddenDownpour@sh.itjust.works 30 points 5 months ago (1 children)

What I got from this is that Anon is undergoing serious financial struggles and is trying to scrape by.

[–] FilthyHookerSpit@lemmy.world 13 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Idk why op would be buying Sennheiser or Corsair peripherals if they're struggling.i just got that op is cheap af.

[–] Manzas@lemdro.id 3 points 5 months ago

Maybe bought used with like 3 months of warranty?

[–] c0ber@lemmy.ml 25 points 5 months ago (1 children)

is it normal to have separate wifi networks for different people in the same apartment?

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 21 points 5 months ago

If they act like that their flatmate has every right to keep ot from them assuming they don't contribute to the bill.

[–] wesker@lemmy.sdf.org 24 points 5 months ago (2 children)

That last one is unforgivable.

[–] sp3tr4l@lemmy.zip 36 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

The last three are horseshit.

Say what you will about the morality of the other but at least they are reasonably likely to actually work.

The last three are not.

Crypto is insane horseshit unless you are running a scam, which at best is a huge amount of effort and at worst is oops time to flee to thailand.

Drop shipping and 'picking' is basically boomer nonsense that requires a huge investment of time, space and money to conceivably make it worthwhile, and it almost always goes wrong, and you end up with a garage or storage unit full of useless crap that won't sell either at all, or for a profit.

There are so many ways you can get fucked as a buyer or seller on eBay, its ludicrous.

[–] RobertoOberto@sh.itjust.works 6 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

Flipping second-hand goods hasn't been viable at any worthwhile scale in over a decade. Too many people know how to use the Internet now, and usually google their shit before it goes on the garage sale or flea market table. The days of finding that rare vase or vintage toy that the owner doesn't know the value of are gone.

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 5 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Estate sales. It's just a bank or company selling a deceased person's stuff to cover costs or save them the hassle of getting rid of it. You can get some premium stuff for cheap because it's not worth the effort to them to do otherwise. Girlfriend found some particular figurines for 25% of what they were worth, but because they're not a common collector item (and there were a TON) it's easier to sell cheap than hold out for the real value.

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[–] morphballganon@lemmy.world 17 points 5 months ago

Downloading torrents on a friend's internet is worse.

Use a cafe instead.

[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 23 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] kilgore_trout@feddit.it 5 points 5 months ago (2 children)
[–] Ferrous@lemmy.ml 18 points 5 months ago (1 children)

You find something cheap from China, then you flip it to suckers on Etsy for 10x the cost.

[–] nutsack@lemmy.world 4 points 5 months ago

More like 1.01x the cost. margins doing this are stupid thin

[–] And009@lemmynsfw.com 10 points 5 months ago

Storefront without stock, when you get order just pass it on to a whole seller with their shipping address.

Profit

[–] corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca 18 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Fraud, theft, and bad spelling.

Trump?

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[–] Codilingus@sh.itjust.works 17 points 5 months ago (3 children)

Sending in Sennheisers for warranty is silly. Their headphones are basically bullet proof, at least their typical wired open cans.

[–] Justas@sh.itjust.works 7 points 5 months ago

I have a Bluetooth headset made by Sennheiser. It's battery died in the first two years of use. So I bought a new battery, except it was bigger.

When I opened it up it turned out that they have thought about someone wanting a bigger battery and I only needed to break a couple of small plastic pieces to fit a longer battery in. The headset has worked fine since.

[–] hswolf@lemmy.world 5 points 5 months ago

Indeed, same with audio technica, god I love their headphones

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[–] jqubed@lemmy.world 15 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Anon is NEET but has a flatmate? Isn’t part of being NEET living with parents?

[–] FeelThePower@lemmy.dbzer0.com 20 points 5 months ago (1 children)

not necessarily. some people get on unemployment and ride it out for years.

[–] Omgboom@lemmy.zip 3 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

Some people get on SSDI and sell magic wands on Etsy and beg for money on YouTube, shoutout to the Dark Lord KingCobraJFS, That's whats up!

[–] nutsack@lemmy.world 10 points 5 months ago

crypto and dropshipping and lock picking vending machines are all lies no homo

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