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[-] zqwzzle@lemmy.ca 190 points 3 weeks ago
[-] applebusch@lemmy.world 26 points 3 weeks ago

Human is endoskeleton optimized crab. Arthropod crab is exoskeleton optimized crab.

[-] bulwark@lemmy.world 124 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Speak for your self.

[-] TheReturnOfPEB@reddthat.com 101 points 3 weeks ago

anyone with extensive use of kitchen tongs has a primordial understanding of our clicky-clack fates

[-] IndiBrony@lemmy.world 33 points 3 weeks ago

It's true. It's so satisfying to click those tongs, how can we NOT turn into crab?

[-] TheReturnOfPEB@reddthat.com 11 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

reincarnation + carcinisation = clickyclackclack

[-] turnipjs@lemmy.ml 8 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

reincarcinisation (clickity clack, crusty comrade)

[-] osaerisxero@kbin.melroy.org 79 points 3 weeks ago

You say we're not crabs, but what do you call car culture and the main battle tank.

We're Hermit crabs!

[-] danc4498@lemmy.world 6 points 3 weeks ago

We’re cosplaying as crabs. We are no crabs.

[-] cybervseas@lemmy.world 75 points 3 weeks ago

For reference, just in case you're actually a crab and have been living under a rock: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carcinisation

[-] electric_nan@lemmy.ml 65 points 3 weeks ago

Meanwhile the crabs on earth: "yo wtf??"

[-] Etterra@lemmy.world 27 points 3 weeks ago

Hey when they can build radio antennas then they can talk to the aliens. Until then they can go play at the beach.

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[-] Agent641@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago

Which crabs do we choose to represent us?

Snow crabs? King crabs? The voice actor for Mr Krabs?

[-] electric_nan@lemmy.ml 4 points 3 weeks ago

Who is "us"? You got a crab in your pocket?

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[-] OpenStars@discuss.online 38 points 3 weeks ago

Suddenly another voice breaks through the silence:

man fighting off crabs

[-] VindictiveJudge@lemmy.world 10 points 3 weeks ago
[-] Mannimarco@lemmy.world 8 points 3 weeks ago
[-] stringere@sh.itjust.works 5 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Nice try, you two, but us crabs ain't falling for your lobstroganda

edit: spelling of lobstroganda

[-] OpenStars@discuss.online 3 points 3 weeks ago

lobstroganda

Wouldn't it be lobstraganda?

Or lasagna, I dunno. Just hurry up and become a crab already!?

[-] stringere@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 weeks ago

I had lobstraganda at first but amended to lobstroganda due to the quoted sources being lobstrosities.

Well, I wasn't 100% sure of how King had spelled it so I searched duck duck go for "ded-a-chek" and the Dark Tower Wiki entry for Lobstrosities topped the list. Sound out of deference to the source material: lobstroganda.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

[-] OpenStars@discuss.online 4 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Oh "lobstrosities" for sure ~(become~ ~a~ ~crab)~

But I'm firm on the "lobstraganda" ~(I~ ~don't~ ~care~ ~just~ ~hurry~ ~up~ ~and~ ~become~ ~a~ ~crab~ ~already!~ - it just makes too much sense, for us ~~crabs~~ uh... gotta go, bye!

~life~ ~as~ ~a~ ~crab~ ~is~ ~awesome~ ~-~ ~are~ ~you~ ~really~ ~really~ ~sure~ ~that~ ~you~ ~don't~ ~want~ ~to~ ~join~ ~us~ ~today~ ~already?~

Edit: it took far too much effort to make every single word small like that, so I totally lost track of what I was doing. So replace "crab" with... whatever you want:-).

[-] GeorgimusPrime@lemmy.world 35 points 3 weeks ago
[-] Crozekiel@lemmy.zip 16 points 3 weeks ago

I just read the synopsis. Wtf did in just read?

[-] SlippiHUD@lemmy.world 12 points 3 weeks ago

It's an excellent movie, I would recommend watching it, even if the synopsis is insane.

[-] dditty@lemm.ee 5 points 3 weeks ago

It is an excellent movie, especially if you go into watching it knowing it's a satire. I went in blind and was totally blindsided

[-] SlippiHUD@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago

Same, still loved it. The big reveal completely derailed my brain for a solid minute before I started cackling like a madman.

[-] Revan343@lemmy.ca 10 points 3 weeks ago

So I saw your comment, went to read the synopsis, and was nodding along like "Yeah, this good, what seemed weird?"...and then hit the line "Looking for the bathroom, Cash discovers a shackled half-horse, half-human hybrid who begs him for help."

...wtf?

Of course now I have to watch it

[-] expr@programming.dev 9 points 3 weeks ago

A synopsis for a great fucking movie.

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[-] ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de 25 points 3 weeks ago

Now that's how a short story is written!

[-] immortal_crab@lemmy.blahaj.zone 24 points 3 weeks ago
[-] bobs_monkey@lemm.ee 23 points 3 weeks ago
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[-] davidgro@lemmy.world 13 points 3 weeks ago
[-] MehBlah@lemmy.world 12 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Crabs do evolve fairly often.

Oh god oh fuck someone out in the black taught them to read

[-] Etterra@lemmy.world 3 points 3 weeks ago

Learning an alien language is what computers and experts are for. It's not easy, but it should be doable. See also https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_OpoWJbo7oM

[-] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 8 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Let's remake StarTrek 4, The Voyage Home...but with crabs!

[-] TotalFat@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago

That should be the title as well

[-] FartsWithAnAccent@fedia.io 7 points 3 weeks ago

"Negative. We are trains."

[-] Feyd@programming.dev 23 points 3 weeks ago

Negative. I am a meat popsicle.

[-] OpenStars@discuss.online 3 points 3 weeks ago

I know what you mean. But still...

img

Not sure if disgusting or delicious.

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[-] satanmat@lemmy.world 6 points 3 weeks ago

We have an over abundance of drawn butter.

[-] refalo@programming.dev 6 points 3 weeks ago

Alternate plot line for the movie Contact

[-] IronSightOS@lemmy.world 5 points 3 weeks ago
[-] TrenchcoatFullofBats@belfry.rip 5 points 3 weeks ago

Do you want Prador? Because this is how you get Prador.

Note: You do not want Prador.

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[-] frauddogg@hexbear.net 3 points 3 weeks ago
[-] OpenStars@discuss.online 3 points 3 weeks ago

You uh... probably want to get that looked at then? :-P

[-] TopRamenBinLaden@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Even our STDs have carcinized.

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this post was submitted on 25 Sep 2024
1221 points (98.6% liked)

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