this post was submitted on 04 Oct 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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I really hope they fully cooked that takoyaki I ate....

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[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 48 points 1 month ago (2 children)

That beak is going to hurt like a mother, though.

[–] cm0002@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

No one said it wouldn't be painful lol

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

TIL what that Coldplay song is about.

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[–] idunnololz@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

Beaked for your pleasure

[–] Dasus@lemmy.world 35 points 1 month ago (7 children)

Flexible enough? Sure.

But will it withstand my stomach acids?

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[–] FreshLight@sh.itjust.works 19 points 1 month ago

That's just great! Now I want that :(

[–] Greg@lemmy.ca 18 points 1 month ago
[–] MilitantAtheist@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I'm pretty sure there's japanese porn on this exact theme

[–] dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Not just porn, but classic art by a famous artist. Check out Hokusai's "The Dream of the Fisherman's Wife."

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[–] DanglingFury@lemmy.world 16 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Stop, please. I can only get so erect.

[–] TriflingToad@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

a small one could probably go up that too

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] thefartographer@lemm.ee 52 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yes, you can enter an octopus' mouth, wriggle around through its digestive tract, and exit their anus. And when you're done, you can eat the octopus shreds from it popping like a you-filled balloon.

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Thanks to you my search history now contains octopus anus.

[–] thefartographer@lemm.ee 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Vs the usual octopus in anus or octopus anus insertion?

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I’m pretty sure 90% of search histories have an octopus in anus variant in them.

[–] thefartographer@lemm.ee 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

90% of my search history is animal anuses.

While I'm totally joking, I for realsies create calendars filled with pictures of animal's butts that I take at the zoo

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago (3 children)
[–] thefartographer@lemm.ee 15 points 1 month ago

That's one of my favorite episodes. I felt so understood. I started taking pictures of animals' butts when I mistimed a pic of a hippo swimming by. I was so amused that it was unlike any other photo you'd normally see of a hippo, but you knew it was a hippo. So I expanded to other animals.

After one trip, I mentioned to my family that I got photos of over 14 animals' butts and my sister said "great, you can make a calendar now." And so it all began.

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[–] PeriodicallyPedantic@lemmy.ca 11 points 1 month ago

Stop it, you'll make me cum

[–] beefbot@lemmy.blahaj.zone 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

It’s called octopussying and you NORMOS and vegans STAY AWAY from OUR KINKCOMMUNITY (/s)

[–] finitebanjo@lemmy.world 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (5 children)

Something an incredibly large number of people do not understand is that solid objects cannot pass through you: anything larger than 1-2mm will not get past the Pylorus Sphincter at the end of your stomach.

Any claims otherwise are misled bullshit.

EDIT: Lots of typos

[–] Routhinator@startrek.website 5 points 1 month ago (4 children)

I never threw the quarter i swallowed at 6 years old back up, doc said it likely passed. Thats hella bigger tam 1-2mm and there's no quarters showing up on imaging... so how exactly does that work?

Not saying I don't believe this its just that reconciling this statement with real world experience isn't adding up.

And now I'm picturing the 'Little Book of Calm' getting absorbed and Bill Bailey running around looking like Jesus and quoting it. I never walked around like moose jesus so I guess I didn't absorb it.

[–] finitebanjo@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Coins will dissolve within a month, pass once small enough. US Quarters are Copper with a plating of Copper Nickel Alloy, all of which will dissolve in acid.

[–] Routhinator@startrek.website 7 points 1 month ago

Now that's interesting.

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[–] WrenHavoc@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I have a stomach ache and this is not helping

[–] Madison420@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

It's just fully autonomous pipe cleaning.

[–] PhlubbaDubba@lemm.ee 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)
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[–] CMDR_Horn@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago

Sounds like the digestive system works

"This is my hole!"

[–] DJKJuicy@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 month ago

Don't threaten me with a good time.

[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 8 points 1 month ago

After sticking a feather in its hat, presumably.

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[–] beebarfbadger@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago
[–] captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)

So's coffee what's your point?

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[–] etchinghillside@reddthat.com 5 points 1 month ago

Don’t give people ideas.

[–] dumbass@leminal.space 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)
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[–] rsuri@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

Obligatory video (click at your own risk)

[–] recarsion@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Could it survive the stomach acid?

[–] RecluseRamble@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 1 month ago

Nope, that's the point. That's how we trick them into get eaten.

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