Asklemmy

Arrange my finances so that I can live an upper middle class life in a passive income. Give away the rest to charities that improve society (education, orgs that promote walkable cities etc. This would also include setting up small recurring donations to Wikipedia, Lemmy and other donation driven institutions).

Depends on the amount. If it's millions or double digits billions - just live life safely while providing for myself, family and friends. If trillions or close to one trillion - heavy investments, heavy usage, adaption and implementation of the plans to end hunger globally that were proposed to Muskrat by UN, development of similar plans to end homelessness, addiction. Immediate global warming countermeasures. Influence political agendas of countries towards implementing socially beneficial policies like UBI, robotization of manual labor. Basically taking off the burden off of working class and humans as a whole.

Hire a permanent live-in nanny so wife and I could sleep soundly and stress less.

That’s first, the rest I would take time and decide and tell no one except the wife

I would buy the best health insurance. Whatever the 1% are using. Super Platinum Cadillac Gold Insurance. I would get my loved ones the best medical care in the world. I could fly them private to see specialists, I could afford 5000$ a month experimental drugs, I could extend their lives and the qaulity of said life.

Pay my parents retirement.

Leave my job & go and see the world. Possibly by finishing off my sailing quals & buying a luxury catamaran or trimaran.

Quit my job.

Assuming "fuck you" money is along the lines of being able to give away money without feeling a hit, I think it would be very interesting to use the money to donate to small open source projects to help them grow and expand with new features and resources.

I'd buy myself a few mercenary armies and state armies as well as weapon manufacturers and just stop selling weapons and waging war. These people probably have skills as drivers or watchmakers, so Glock would start making watches and Wagner would be a chauffeur service.

I'll probably still have a division special force to take guns away from everyone in the world but police force in Democratic governments. As soon as they fulfilled their purpose, they'd have to hand in their guns to the local police.

My hypothesis is that every person with a gun is willing to part from it for the right price. And the others just have to go, I guess.

Dump all of it into researching how to grow tardigrades larger, until they are big enough to take down a fully grown man. Then build up an army of them and unleash them on the world.

With my tardigrade army giving me complete control over the world, I will begin enacting my ultimate goal:

Making that bitch Sarah pay for making fun of me in primary school.

"Fuck you" Sarah.

Buy Twitter back and ban Elmo

Tax fraud

Destroying medicine price in USA, by sellingi nsulin and other important medicines at affordable price. In my country, Insulin for pets which isn't subsidized by the government is far cheaper than insulin for human in USA.

Disappear and become someone else.

probably spend it on a bunch of landscaping for my parents yard to turn it into a "no lawn" (I fking hate mowing the lawn)

Pay off the debt of everyone in my family

Not sure exactly how much money that constitutes, but assuming I somehow inherited a reasonably large sum of money, do mostly the same thing I am doing now.

Pay immediate cost of living expenses for myself and my partner. I don't have any expensive hobbies that I would need much more. I don't make a ton of money right now, yet it's still more than I can reasonably spend. After rent and food, like half my paycheque goes into the bank already. I am lucky to live in a country where I don't have to worry about an unexpected medical condition costing me millions.

The remaining would go towards charities/local political groups I am involved in. While not without precedence, it would be a strange look to be a stupidly wealthy socialist, and again the money would have no real use to me and would be better served elsewhere.

Doesn’t matter because you’d never hear from me again.

I'll start a non-profit company that does proper R&D and makes smart devices that's totally open source ground up from hardware and software maybe DIY 3D printable, communicating over an open protocol (matter probably) and managed by an open system/assistant, and extend it to an open self hostable ecosystem of everything AND make sure it's plug and play usable for every end user with installation service whenever necessary and other. And make it sustainable. It can only be done with "fuck you" money and never let VCs anywhere near.

pay my debts, a full medical workup, some minor dentistry, then invest wisely after getting some financial advice from a professional advisor because I don’t really know what I’m doing.

Fire Fest 2

Buy a nice reasonably big house, set money aside for my kid, buy a new car, help people close to me. In this order.

I would build myself a mansion like the Le château de Moulinsart in Tintin.

It's definitely a tie between buying and remodeling a house in the city I live in (probably in one of the nicer areas in town but definitely not the nicest because I don't want to deal with stuck up prick neighbors who'd think they're better than me) and just going on an art commission spree of getting a red sheet for my fursona and then getting a very high quality partial fursuit and clothes to match his style.

There are a number of people I would need to say “fuck you “ to

Pay off my mom's house and get it completely renovated, included hooking it up to the sewer line and completely redoing the foundation. I'd also add a second story with a balcony facing the direction of the ocean.

First thing I would do? Without question a year-long holiday. I haven't had more than a few days off at a time for over five years.

Buy a bowling center.

I'd pay my debts first and then travel.

Relax.