this post was submitted on 08 Nov 2024
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Funny: Home of the Haha

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top 29 comments
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[–] CrayonRosary@lemmy.world 7 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I recently leaned a lot of these "oldest people" are not who they say they are, are much younger, and are involved in pension fraud. Especially when birth records from 100+ years ago didn't necessarily exist.

Kinda ruined all these wholesome stories for me.

[–] Zetta@mander.xyz 2 points 6 days ago

I'm sure some of them are as you say, but surely a few news stories we hear about oldest person are true.

Either way, I like to pretend I will live a long, healthy, and fulfilled life till I'm 155, so please don't ruin that for me. Thank you.

[–] johannesvanderwhales@lemmy.world 6 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 2 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Just like the secret to flying.

[–] daddy32@lemmy.world 1 points 6 days ago

Well not exactly, to fly, you don't need to avoid falling, you just need to make sure you avoid the ground when you fall.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 4 points 6 days ago

Someone on another forum I'm on shared us two photos- him in the 90s and him today, to show that he has had no hair since high school.

But he also looked exactly the same age.

He told us the secret was to not start aging until you're ready.

[–] r0bi@infosec.pub 3 points 6 days ago

Big if true.

[–] HowManyNimons@lemmy.world 3 points 6 days ago

The trick is to keep breathing.

A saying where I'm from goes something like: "To get old, eat soup for 100 years."

[–] dsilverz@thelemmy.club 2 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

This reminds me of a currently trending Brazilian meme (amostradinho) that I'll translate here: "Huh, what audacity! In my presence? I like this way, the lil' exhibitionistic, let me fill your ticket, 'Once upon a day...', and that day is today, it's now!"

[–] iAvicenna@lemmy.world 2 points 6 days ago

that is top notch british humour for you gentlemen

[–] d00phy@lemmy.world 31 points 1 week ago (1 children)
  1. This is such an old man answer
  2. This is such an English old man answer
  3. Considering what he’s lived through, “avoid dying” is pretty solid advice, and only a little bit tongue-in-cheek.
[–] FelixCress@lemmy.world 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Considering what he’s lived through

Margaret Thatcher?

[–] d00phy@lemmy.world 1 points 6 days ago

Among… some other things.

[–] Nurgus@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago

England's oldest man is 42 and looking goooood.

Wisdom truly comes with age.

[–] IndustryStandard@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Dodge, dip, duck, dive, and dodge!

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Kick! Punch! It's all in the mind!

If ya wanna test me, I'm sure you'll find...

The things I teach ya, are sure to beat'cha!

Never the less, you get a lession from teacha! Now!

Kick!

You need to be over 100 to get this reference.

[–] newthrowaway20@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Harder for some than others.

[–] FartsWithAnAccent@fedia.io 1 points 1 week ago

If you fail, you don't have to worry about it anymore.

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago

Grandpa jokes

[–] cmgvd3lw@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 1 week ago

He is trolling the dead.

[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 3 points 1 week ago

So far so good

[–] leftzero@lemmynsfw.com 3 points 1 week ago

Worked for me so far.

Make this guy head of EHHS

[–] Assman@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 week ago

Pssh I've been not dying for 38 years and I'm still not the world's oldest man