this post was submitted on 03 Jan 2025
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works
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Anon's strict mom (lemmy.ml)
submitted 1 week ago by LifeLemons@lemmy.ml to c/greentext@sh.itjust.works
179 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

The fuck?

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[–] Econgrad@lemmy.world 19 points 6 days ago (1 children)

This has to be fake.

[–] MintyAnt@lemmy.world 25 points 6 days ago

4chan posts are never fake though

[–] tacosanonymous@lemm.ee 19 points 6 days ago

Is she checking her own socks and underwear?

[–] WastingCommentSpace@sh.itjust.works 4 points 6 days ago

I am definitely old. I no longer understand the internet.

[–] state_electrician@discuss.tchncs.de 189 points 1 week ago (9 children)

What kind of Wooldoor Sockbat cum clogs a shower? This is so idiotic.

[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 119 points 1 week ago (4 children)

But... but... people wouldn't just go and make shit up on the internet, would they?

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[–] spacecadet@lemm.ee 126 points 1 week ago (12 children)

There is either:

  1. A backstory we are missing
  2. Anon has a weird fetish
  3. mom has a weird fetish
  4. story is fake and straight
  5. story is real and gay
  6. some combination of the above
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[–] sexual_tomato@lemmy.dbzer0.com 92 points 1 week ago

Start watching sissy hypnosis videos to condition yourself into eating it, obviously. It's the only undetectable disposal method.

[–] Mr_Blott@feddit.uk 86 points 1 week ago (21 children)

Jesus fuck man, what kind of plumbing blocks with jizz? I could literally eat prunes and tortillas for a week and still waffle-stomp my turd down a 40mm pipe

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[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 80 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Just eat it you coward.

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[–] stebo02@lemmy.dbzer0.com 65 points 1 week ago (4 children)

what kind of semen clog the shower drain?

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[–] Gullible@sh.itjust.works 61 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Why not simply overflow her with your cum tissues? She’s your mom, so you should know her inside and out, so her buffer should be accessible. I ask for 257 tissues every day and my mom has no idea

[–] starman2112@sh.itjust.works 61 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I like that this implies that OP's mom uses an 8 bit counting system

I'm imagining her at a super expensive restaurant getting a bill for like $547 and thinking "wow, this only cost $35!"

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[–] TheSlad@sh.itjust.works 59 points 1 week ago

Blow your load on her bedsheets

[–] slaacaa@lemmy.world 53 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Time to break your hands

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[–] Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee 48 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Why tf does op masturbate in secret?
A healthy family doesn't keep secrets from each other!

Also buy a dryer, she obviously doesn't get stuck very often.

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[–] nutsack@lemmy.world 48 points 1 week ago (11 children)

clogging the shower drain with cum

ok

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