In response to @CARCOSA@hexbear.nets last post in the previous thread and their announcement about stepping down

Carcosa, please don't step down. There is nothing wrong with making mistakes, what is wrong is not reflecting upon those mistakes, and you are very capable of self-reflection. Expecting someone to operate without error forever is ludicrous, an impossible demand. You are about the best person we could have in the position. You are patient, considerate and capable of balancing a great many groups, even when getting treated like the whipping boy.^[Sorry for using a gendered term, but I think they were always boys]
You haven't made any real errors in handling all this. Mistakes were made, but that's not really on you. It's obvious you've got a clique of mods that whip up a frenzy among themselves and then shield their shitty opinions with leftist rhetoric. Ironically that is what makes hexbear most like a real-world org lol. You probably interact with them a lot and you experience their positive side as well. Something like this was bound to happen with that going on for long enough time. You get lambasted by these dorks, they use rhetoric like calling the users "cishet white men" despite most of this sites' userbase being queer.

I've been thinking about this since the last post about chauvinism "scaring people away" and then looking in the thread to see how it was celebrated. Hell, I've been thinking about since we talked about closing the news mega because some users didn't like "the vibe". They talked of chauvinism back then too. Funny how it seems to mean "things I don't like" and not actually being descriptive of chauvinism.
Just like in this thread, the very same people who act like toxic assholes were partying that now "finally" hexbear was becoming a good site open for all. As long as those people completely line up with what the little clique act like. I didn't want to say anything at the time, but I probably should have. I can't speak on behalf of women, on account of not being one, but I personally do not experience this site as inherently masculine.

The only thing that really turns me off from this site, is the toxic and hostile clique that for some reason is allowed to act in a way that would get all others banned, and for some reason are listened to and taken more seriously than the rest of the site. There's a group who seems to think this place is their personal project, despite just being a link in a long chain of mods, despite not being here for very long^[not that longevity matters, because the site doesn't belong to anyone, but if we were gonna have to entertain that silly idea, it most certainly does not belong to someone who doesn't know about John Kerry or whatever. See how silly that sounds? That's because the site is what the site is, it doesn't belong to anyone, it doesn't need to be managed. That's not good for "culture" or for "growth" or for whatever other argument these asscracks cook up next.] The main thing that keeps me from recommending this place to my girlfriends - and my enbiefriends - and my boyfriends - is that clique of needlessly hostile, agressive stereotype of an online leftist. Shit I wouldn't be surprised if one of them is actually employed by my boss^[If some mod is gonna remove this for fed-jacketing, just give me a heads-up instead and I'll edit out the obvious joke].

I guess I was getting a bit sidetracked in the previous paragraph, but I'm trying to illustrate a point. You're interacting with these people a lot and due to your reasoning (which makes great sense for sure, just unfortunate that the people you got sucked. I guess it is true that those who want to be mods, generally are not people that should be mods lol) you weigh their viewpoints highly. Which makes sense. Their viewpoints just suck ass, because they're shitty people. This would of course result in you not being able to foresee something like this happening - Though you probably expected a bit of a struggle sesh, but not this dumpsterfire. And then when people react as we've reacted,^[Which has been very reasonable until getting misgendered, where it then became even more reasonable] of course you would try to handle it. And being a good considerate person, you make sure to loop in the other side - the mods who made this decision. So you listen to the mods about how to handle this strugglesesh. The same mods who are chauvinistic toxic cliquey assholes. Listening to their advice has then only gone on to make things worse. You, being a good person, have tried to handle things as best you could. Releasing statements to make the process more transparent, replying to users with statements you've been adviced about from the mods, constantly trying to keep people informed without blowing the lid off things. Trying to stop drama comms and so on make great sense.

Taking the actions you've taken throughout this thread makes sense, please don't beat yourself up about it.
Don't get me wrong, I am mad and disappointed, but not at you. I think the fact you are still as patient as you are, as able to keep a light tone, able to listen to - or at the very least appear to be listening to - a userbase that has been (rightfully) inflamed, is impressive and should be applauded. The fact you're not a toxic douchebag after interacting with that set of mods for so long is very telling of your character. I'm not trying to kiss ass here, I just think it seems like you're a bit down about how this whole thing has gone, and I really need you to understand you handled it about as best as it could be handled, given your colleagues being completely useless rags.

Please don't go away or hand the reins over to one of those pissbabies carcosa, please don't let that clique ruin this place. Please do not step down. You are incredibly important to the health of this site and, speaking on a personal note, you are a fantastic person to have around and I am happy to see you in the position at the helm of the site

Going forward

I don't think this is the last time this situation will erupt, if nothing changes about how moderation is handled and how site changes are handled.
Keeping the two comms open just leaves a sour taste in my mouth. Not kicking the mods who wrote that shit out is also a bad sign, for the direction this whole thing is headed.
I would really recommend that mod discussions aren't anonymous anymore. Have the matrix board or whatever it is, but make it so everyone can go and look what is being posted, just like with the modlog. The only time discussions should be anonymous, should be when there is a risk to operational security, and not a vague risk, an actual one. It should also be announced whenever those anonymous discussions take place and explained why they have to be anonymous.
Early in the site days we went away from displaying which mod took an action in the modlog, and just blaming everything on automod. I think reverting that would go a very long way to bust a lot of this cliquey shit.
When users notice certain users get special treatment, they get banned for commenting on it, until the situation becomes so egregious that it cannot be hidden anymore. Not allowing the userbase to call out bad mod practice, is also not good. We've closed both userunion and feedback because the mods don't like the "drama" - Getting called out for shitty behaviour. We really need a comm where the userbase is free to voice concerns and grievances. That would also go a long way towards avoiding these situations in the future. And this time mods shouldn't remove posts just because they dislike them, that's pissbaby shit.

Edit: Please don't step down because you feel like you've done wrong. If you ever do step down, let it be because you need time away, not because of some dumbass strugglesession, the site would be worse off without you. Especially in the middle of this shitstorm.

Edit: Formatting