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You're right, I've definitely been doomscrolling way too much.
I think the biggest thing holding me back is the idea that it is too late to do anything because my life could effectively be over in less than a few months. I see lots of people dooming about fascist purges and the end of societal function and think, "Well, how do I know for sure that they're wrong? I don't know enough about society to make a solid prediction either way."
And so my brain thinks "There is a reasonable chance that my life is over (or at least the ladder to make any life progress gets pulled up) in a few months. If everything I do is all for naught, then why bother?" It's a belief that I have no long-term agency.
I think that in order to move forward, I have to disprove the idea of me being targeted in a fascist purge and complete economic collapse happening anytime soon with reasonable certainty. Are those sound predictions, or are they just nightmares dreamt up by a bunch of armchair historian doomers exaggerating how quickly these things happen? Is the theory that the "day one mass deportations" include all known political dissidents actually possible, or are the logistics too insane to work? That's what I have to figure out, or else I will likely continue to believe that I am helpless.
In other words, I think it's quite plausible that I'm reading misinformation, but the fact that I don't know it for sure is preventing me from dismissing it outright.
Thank you for the thoughtful reply!
First off, let me say that I see a close to zero chance that society will collapse in a matter of months or that there will be mobs out to kill disabled people.
America has reached a turning point and is certainly starting to spiral, but these kinds of radical changes you're talking about take a long time to happen. People revolt violently when they can no longer afford bread, and the US is nowhere close to that.
Quality of life is declining, job opportunities are diminishing, but America is so far away from bread lines that it's just not going to happen in the short term. Remember the elites DON'T WANT social collapse. That's very bad for business! They will gamble with our future and with the prosperity of the country for a little more over and over, but they want to keep the system up and held together with duct tape as long as possible or their profits fall too.
So yes, there is real turmoil, but nothing is coming to an end tomorrow, next month, or next year. Keep educating yourself, but stay positive and do what you can to enact change.
I recommend the It Could Happen Here podcasts from after election day. I'm not caught up, but the three I listened to acknowledge the terror of the situation we're in while also trying to put things like mass deportation in context. It's going to be so unbelievably expensive. So no I don't think dissidents like you or myself are on the list, yet.
Just my 2 cents, but the logistics part is substantial. Our jails and prisons are already overflowing (with the highest incarceration rate of the global north) so there's no quick process that is feasible. We should have plenty of warning as to what's coming down the works... as for having the means and ability to do anything about it? We shall see.
You're not helpless unless you don't take action. Build your community and celebrate the small wins. Find meaningful work(even volunteering) and build more connections to others. Having some of that to fall back on has kept me saner lately, and now I'm driven to focus more on that, least for the short term.
Consider the fact that you can change your life slowly with concerted effort. It helps me!