this post was submitted on 18 Nov 2024
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Yes and I have lengthy struggle sessions with myself over whether this indicates narcissistic traits in my personality. To be clear I am not suggesting that this is the case for anyone else who walks faster than their companions. But I've really beat myself up over it at times.
I'm marginally better at matching my pace to whoever I'm walking with now. But yeah. Keep up damnit.
When I'm being most truthful with myself I think it stems from anxiety and is related to my hypervigilance. Sometimes I yearn for a past relationship with a woman who was wired the same way. We would flow through crowds together and it felt amazing.
Also I just have long legs and it feels bad and restrictive to walk slow. But that's my problem to deal with not to foist on the people I'm walking with who might be struggling to keep up.
... I have really deep demons around this stuff.