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this post was submitted on 15 Nov 2022
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GenZedong
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My family background is Belarussian, and guests must have a full 3 course dinner, bread, tea, a lot of sweets to go with the tea, some fresh fruit, and 5 large Tupperware containers of extra dinner. If they do not go through this process they will be bared from leaving the house. I have also never left a Portuguese friends house without their Avó using an excavator to shovel food into my mouth.
It has been drilled into me from birth that I should never EVER eat or drink anything in front of friends, or houseguests without offering them some lmao. I don't understand how people, especially well off people, can religiously guard food. Even when I am starving and have 10 dollars worth of food to make it through the week, I can't imagine not sharing or offering anything to a guest or friend, it just seems so rude and selfish.
This stuff right here is worth preserving. I love to cook. But I also only like to cook if it's for more than just me.
It's really just a very basic human love language. Damn near primordial. It says; I am aware of hunger and I am aware of the joys of a full belly. And since I have the power to prevent you from feeling hunger; I will do that.
To be THIS MAD over a woman wanting to feed her knuckle headed neighbors is stunning.
Where I work, we used to do unsanctioned pot lucks. Outside the mandates of management. Stuff like that builds solidarity. I have older women coworkers who straight up feed me and on return; I usually find myself making sure I do most the heavy lifting in my job specifically for them because they're older and I dont wanna see my coworkers risk hurting themselves.
It aint patriarchy for women to cook for men. It's patriarchy to MAKE women cook for men as a prescriptive expectation of gender roles.
Why be angry at women who WANT to be motherly?
This is what individualism does to an mf. If my guest wants food they would have bought it and brought it to my house 🤡. I've been to house parties where the rule is "bring your own beer". Not "I have stuff but always appreciate more" just straight bring your own lmfao.