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I see what you mean. I guess it's hard though because currently they can already say that (they aren't afraid of gay people and therefore aren't "homophobic" if interpeting the word literally, but they just hate them), whereas if there was a word that meant hatred of gay people, they would have to admit they are that thing instead, which would then be viewed worse by society in a similar way to racism or misogyny etc. If a word existed for it, they would have no recourse but to admit that even if they aren't technically homophobic (though they are by the common understanding and usage of the word), they are still word that means hateful/discriminatory toward gay people. And if there's no distinction, I don't know what we can say to people who aren't hateful but just afraid of the idea of homosexuality. What do they tell their therapist? "I have a fear of homosexuality and/or gay people but I don't hate it/them"? That's a mouthful and a simple word could suffice couldn't it?
And you're right, they do. But I've got little interest in providing them with more nuance to explain why they want me to have less rights than them.
No, they wouldn't. They would just say that they don't hate queer folk, because they don't want to hurt/exile/kill them etc. They do this already.
"I don't hate gay folk, but... "
In all my years, I've never encountered such a person. If they do exist, then they can just explain it to their therapist in full sentences as needed, rather than normalising some forms of bigotry.
Even if someone is "afraid" of gay folk, that's still their problem. It's something they need to work on, rather than pushing the mental cost of working through their irrational fears on people that are already unfairly targeted by bigotry.