this post was submitted on 09 May 2024
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They're culinary vegetables. My wife likes to say it like this: intelligence is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, wisdom is knowing that it doesn't go in a fruit salad.
I always love the "explaining dnd stats with a tomato" bit:
Strength is being able to throw a tomato really far.
Dexterity is being able to catch the tomato thrown really far.
Constitution is being fine after eating a bad tomato.
Intelligence is knowing a tomato is a fruit.
Wisdom is knowing a tomato doesn't go in fruit salad.
Charisma is being able to sell a tomato based fruit salad.
Also, obligatory "salsa is tomato in a fruit salad".
Isn't a tomato the only fruit in salsa?
...no, salsa is mostly peppers...
Can't forget about peppers
I hadn't but wasn't thinking of them as fruit, also has a lot of onions which also isn't a fruit.
You know you can just put whatever you want in your salsa right, no cop is gonna stop you. I have a very nice mango salsa the other night, it was only one step removed from a fancy fruit salad.
And the obligatory response to the “tomato-based fruit salad” response: “found the bard!”
Alternatively you could stick with the theme established by the first two stats and say that constitution is throwing a tomato really far repeatedly.
Caprese is fruit salad.
Everyone loves my tomato/eggplant/pumpkin fruit salad. I bring it to parties, and they all say it looks so good, they want to make sure everyone else gets a chance to eat it. Except everyone says that, and I end up having to take it home and throw it out.
Well, sweet tomato marmalade is actually quite tasty ;)