The Onion

4504 readers

723 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 2 years ago

MODERATORS

seahorse@midwest.social

pbrisgreat@midwest.social

340

Donald Trump Promises To Bring Fruitopia Vending Machines Back to Public Schools if Elected in Latest Unhinged Rant (thehardtimes.net)

submitted 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) by seahorse@midwest.social to c/theonion@midwest.social

37 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Until this moment I completely forgot about those things

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

The flavor name "lizard fuel" always amused me for some reason.

[–] anarchoilluminati@hexbear.net 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Haha Their branding was somehow so effective.

I definitely had that lizard energy when I would drink those as a teen sitting around my room g*ming for endless hours without movement. I would drink the carrot one, I thought it would help balance the damage I was causing to my eyes from so much screentime, only found out years later that was British propaganda. My eyesight sucks now.

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I definitely had that lizard energy when I would drink those as a teen sitting around my room g*ming for endless hours without movement. I would drink the carrot one, I thought it would help balance the damage I was causing to my eyes from so much screentime, only found out years later that was British propaganda. My eyesight sucks now.

Oh that takes me back, I did the exact same thing with that exact same flavor. meemaw

[–] anarchoilluminati@hexbear.net 2 points 2 months ago

Carrot Comrade. fidel-salute-big