Good news: In America, there are currently lots of opportunities to go to prison (not an American? It's even easier!)
Bad news: it's not the kind of prison with gym and art.
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Good news: In America, there are currently lots of opportunities to go to prison (not an American? It's even easier!)
Bad news: it's not the kind of prison with gym and art.
Could be a good career move. Look at Nelson Mandela; he died in prison and then became president.
With or without a monocle?
Omg. As someone who's done time... I get it.
Yeah, okay. Good luck focusing when you're interrupted by three square meals a day and a predictable bedtime.
not to mention all the anal sex
Stop making prison sound awesome 😩
No homo but I was going to say something like this if you didn't
Nothing wrong with it if you were, tho. Nothing wrong with you not being, tho. Nothing wrong ever. Except maybe nonconsensual anal sex, but only because it's nonconsensual.
one of my friends would always say "no homo but blablablah..... ok maybe a decent amount homo" and I swear everyone started saying similar stuff
Go on.
I just learned a prison in my municipality has its inmates train dogs.
I went looking for a sign up sheet. Found none :(
What's the softest way to earn a stint in prison?
In the Bobiverse books, a guy uploads his brain into a computer. He then spends years flying accross space, because it takes years to get anywhere. I've often dreamed of having a few decades just to work on my fun personal projects, uninterrupted.
It gets old after 3-5 years and you start to encounter fundamental needs like social interaction and the purpose work brings to one's life. The failures weigh pretty heavily; far more that you're likely to expect. A lot of my best ideas and dreams for projects were unexpectedly tied to other chance circumstances that were not present when I had all the time in the world.
Mind you, I am very physically limited, still fully mobile but I can't hold upright posture to sit up or stand for more than an hour at a time. That has never changed in 11 years, but I am degrading and was slightly more physically capable years ago.
I was super capable with my hands before things changed like, painting cars, building engines, high level fabrication, some machining, mig, stick, and tig welding etc. I had to learn new interests like electronics, programming, and 3d printing. Still I have had the unlimited time hack in life, largely in social isolation due to limitations. Lemmy is a substantial remedy to this very problem for me.
Anyways, life is about the journey, not the destination, so don't get too hung up on those dreams of unlimited time. Should you be unlucky enough to experience something like I have, you'll likely miss what you have now and realize the richness of your present dynamic range of life experience.
As a stay at home dad, I should have time to accomplish something, but I don’t. I just clean all day and chase kids around.
Then I get insecure and have nightmares where my wife is telling me she’s moving out because she found someone else who has a good job.
I plead with her, “I’m only doing this because you told me to! I’ll go work wherever. We’ve got it good. We’re happy. Why are you doing this? I would have never quit my job without you telling me to do just that, and this is what it gets me?”
I really wish I could stop my brain from creating all of this stupid shit when I go to sleep. I at least wish I could sleep through it and forget about it.
I at least know it’s just my insecurity and I don’t make it her problem. I had an ex who would dream I cheated or that I was leaving her and she’d be pissed at me for days haha. I was all, “look babe, I didn’t fuck her, you practically just seen a drawing that your brain made of me fucking her. You can’t hold that against me!” :p
Don't forget he can also adjust his perception of the passing of time.
Bro is locked in
Can I get 40K figures, plastic cement, brushes, and paint in prison by any chance? If so, which ones?
No reason.
You can, but you only get GW brand paints and bushes (at full price). No wet pallete either, have fun with the paint skin.
Pretty sure it don't work like that
It do
I have unironically thought this of myself
Same. I blame 80s TV montages.