this post was submitted on 22 Nov 2023
256 points (96.7% liked)

Not The Onion

12314 readers
382 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
all 46 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] JackDark@lemmy.world 77 points 1 year ago

I love the black man in the background of the thumbnail. "Is this motherfucker serious??"

[–] BroBot9000@lemmy.world 38 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Congratulations Jim! You won a free submarine ride.

[–] intensely_human@lemm.ee 2 points 11 months ago

Whoa that’s deep

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 27 points 1 year ago (1 children)

i want to live in their invented universe

[–] jonne@infosec.pub 16 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Imagine being a billionaire and still living with a the victim mentality they abuse the proletariat of having.

[–] Vinny_93@lemmy.world 24 points 1 year ago

Objection, your honour. Irsay.

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 23 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The 64-year-old businessman also told Real Sports that he has gone to rehab for addiction 15 times

I believe him when he says his hip surgery is the reason he failed the sobriety test. After 15 rehabs, he surely never operated a vehicle while intoxicated. That would defy all odds.

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 9 points 1 year ago

Also, jackass

[–] zbyte64@lemmy.blahaj.zone 21 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Must be because of all those billionaires supporting defund the police. 🤣

[–] RvTV95XBeo@sh.itjust.works 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

He thinks being part of the 1% makes him technically a minority

[–] vanquesse@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 11 months ago

He just chose to never learn the difference between "minority" and "marginalized"

[–] PrincessLeiasCat@sh.itjust.works 17 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Won’t someone think of the white male billionaires?!?!?!

[–] FireWire400@lemmy.world 16 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

March 2014

The arrest in question took place almost 10 years ago... Seems like someone got his feelings hurt big time

[–] SquigglyEmpire@lemmy.world 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Police in the Indianapolis suburb of Carmel pulled Irsay over after observing a man in a Toyota Highlander driving slowly, stopping in the roadway and failing to use a turn signal.

Lol. Yeah police across the world are constantly pulling over Toyota Highlanders driving like a confused elderly lady merging on to an interstate, everyone knows that's the profile for a whiny jackass billionaire.

[–] nilloc@discuss.tchncs.de 8 points 1 year ago

“I don’t care what it sounds like,” Irsay said. “It’s the truth ... I could give a damn what people think how anything sounds or sounds like. The truth is the truth, and I know the truth.”

This is the real problem with the billionaires. It doesn’t matter what they do or what anyone other than maybe other billionaires think.

[–] Dradious@lemmy.world 16 points 1 year ago

Just about every time I pass a car that got pulled over, the driver looks just like the monopoly guy

[–] Pyr_Pressure@lemmy.ca 16 points 1 year ago

It can't be all that bad if he still chooses to be a wealthy old white man. He can choose to be just an old white man, most people with actual prejudice can't choose to change what they are targeted for.

[–] TSG_Asmodeus@lemmy.world 11 points 11 months ago

Hahahahahahahaha

[–] brothershamus@kbin.social 9 points 1 year ago

Leave the white! Billionaires! Aloooooone! sob

FFS

[–] alienanimals@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

Fuck Jim Isray

[–] kowcop@aussie.zone 4 points 1 year ago

Oh boo hoo.. poor bastard gonna have to get his chauffeur to drive for a few months

[–] intensely_human@lemm.ee 3 points 11 months ago

The dude in the background 🤣