this post was submitted on 07 Dec 2023
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[–] val@infosec.pub 49 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I once joined a random pick up game online. Had a session zero, vibe seem alright.

On the day we actually go to play it turns out the DM invited a bunch more people and the group was going to be 8 people. Two of these people show up late, don't even have character sheets ready. Game was advertised as queer friendly, one of them I think makes their character a transphobic joke but the guy was so awkward it was hard to make out what he was doing. Vibe is now fucked. One person quits the group on the spot.

I spend like three hours of the least inspired, boring D&D of my life. There is no hint that's it's wrapping up anytime soon. All we've done is spin our wheels trying to grab on to the quest hook, being strung along to talk to the next random generic NPC to inch us closer to actually starting the adventure and had a single combat encounter with one creature where I'm not sure anyone even took any damage.

I have to stress, I think the DM was a nice guy even if he kind of sucked at it. I liked the original group of people.

But I break when he guides us to start shopping. We haven't even started the adventure and it's about to turn into a shopping episode. I panic, I have to leave this fucking moment because I can't take it anymore. I'm desperate for an excuse to leave that wont hurt the DM's self-esteem and ruin the game for anyone who was having fun. The best thing I can come up with?

I disconnect mid sentence and act as if the internet dropped out like a bad sit-com phone gag. This wasn't even well acted, my brain died when I went to disconnect and I just trailed off awkwardly. It's still so painfully embarrassing to remember. Yet I maintain it was worth it.

[–] OnlyAwfulNamesLeft@lemmy.dbzer0.com 35 points 11 months ago (2 children)

I was in a group that were all "officers of the watch". Some idea was proposed that my character would have no reason to go along with, but rather than stop the group engaging in something fun, I say so, and follow up with "my character probably has some paperwork they need to catch up on anyway."

Our chaotic player, who has the attention span of a slightly concussed goldfish goes "wait, we have to do paperwork?" and our GM, the goddamned sadist, gets that evil gleam in his eye.

Long story short, that session we role-played the sheer amount of paperwork our last session of kicking in the door and stopping a cultist ritual (by force in some cases) would have generated.

I admire that GM, but I was almost screaming in frustration by the end.

[–] The_Picard_Maneuver@startrek.website 6 points 11 months ago (1 children)

This is hilarious. I bet the DM got out some frustration that day.

[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Sounds like one of the 12 Tasks of Asterix. They have to get a permit or form filled out in a government building known as "the place that drives you mad." Like crazy, not angry. Asterix ends up turning the bureaucracy against itself.

[–] c0mbatbag3l@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Why the fuck would anyone who wants their players to have fun make them do paperwork in a game? I'd have quit on the spot or told them to shove it.

There's already enough paperwork on character sheets, putting it in game canonically unless it's some gag comedy thing sounds like the fastest way to be the GM without players.

[–] ProfessorOwl_PhD@hexbear.net 30 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

If you're gonna do RP shopping, you gotta establish before the session that's gonna be what's happening so everyone can come up with ways to interact with the scenario.

You also absolutely have to (looking at you in particular, 5e) establish availabilities and exact prices beforehand. The back and forth of "how much does X cost -> I can't afford that" is the biggest waste of time when shopping.

[–] Jaded@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 11 months ago

I like to make little cards for my shops with the items on it so I can just hand them out whenever one person goes to a shop

[–] mnemonicmonkeys@sh.itjust.works 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

You also absolutely have to (looking at you in particular, 5e) establish availabilities and exact prices beforehand.

PF2E's built in tables ftw!

[–] Eagle0600@yiffit.net 4 points 11 months ago
[–] zifnab25@hexbear.net 22 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Genuinely love to break up a combat/dungeon-crawl heavy game with some light-hearted day-in-the-life-of gameplay once in a while. Having the DM describe the lazy cat stretched across the alchemist's countertop, while some mischievious pickpocket tries to nick the rogue's enchanted dagger and the knight errant helps an elderly woman cross the street can add a lot of color to a very number-crunchy game. Picking through a flea market of random niche nebulously useful magic items, while a merchant drops hints about the next sidequest, gives you a real adventurer's vibe.

Genuinely hate having long, drawn out arguments over whether the shopkeep would have the principle material component for my most import spells or basic equipment (there's no bat guano, one swayback horse, and only sixteen arrows in a fantasy city of 50,000 people? god damn, dude). Or digging through spreadsheets to figure out how many javelins the local economy can absorb. Or bickering over whether the Charm Person spell gets us in fight with town guards. Genuinely do not want anyone consulting a series of random charts and tables to determine why we can't get a full night's rest in the town's nicest inn.

Please just make this a fun story to enjoy and not a pedantic fight over the future prospective mathematical efficiency of my stat block in the next combat.

[–] PugJesus@kbin.social 6 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Or digging through spreadsheets to figure out how many javelins the local economy can absorb.

I actually love this kind of discussion but generally it sparks up because of some javelin-related scheme someone has.

[–] OnlyAwfulNamesLeft@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

"Wait... All of these hobgoblins have javelins!? This is a market opportunity!"

[–] PugJesus@kbin.social 3 points 11 months ago

Have you really played D&D until you set up a market stall in the middle of town and tried to convince the DM corpsing as a peasant to buy your exotic, all-organic, dungeon-harvested goods?

[–] barrbaric@hexbear.net 12 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Meanwhile in my games PCs regularly never buy or upgrade equipment because nobody wants to waste time in session (good!) but also refuse to just do stuff through discord during the rest of the week (bad!).

[–] psud@aussie.zone 3 points 11 months ago

I have several shops designed and NPC staffed in the characters home town. They seem allergic to selling or buying though

[–] ProfessorOwl_PhD@hexbear.net 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

When I switched from Roll20 to Foundry I discovered my players hadn't been recording half the loot I gave them and barely had level 5 equipment at level 10. I had to replace the next pile of loot with 120,000gp worth of character specific magic items to get them appropriately equipped.

[–] SwiggitySwole@lemm.ee 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

You should try the item piles module for foundry if you haven't checked it out yet, it shows you in the chat if they're taking items and gold and you don't have to finagle around with manually giving them items

[–] ProfessorOwl_PhD@hexbear.net 2 points 11 months ago

That was back when I was on Pathfinder, I'm on PF2e now so merchants and chests are included in the system by default.

[–] DroneRights@lemm.ee 2 points 11 months ago

Sounds like they're overdue for an encounter with a rust monster

[–] Clasm@lemmy.world 11 points 11 months ago

I had a game where done other players tried to pull the "shopping episode" stuff twice before I had to put my foot down.

We hadn't even gone on our first quest yet. We had no Gold to buy anything.

[–] DmMacniel@feddit.de 10 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Well it's roleplay isn't it?

[–] ech@lemm.ee 10 points 11 months ago

If one person is dominating the game that much, that's not a good thing.

[–] SquirtleHermit@lemmy.world 9 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

All good jazz musicians and role players know, its not about the notes you play, but the ones you don't.

Edit: After watching HBomberguy's plagerism video, I feel compelled to mention that this is a butchered Miles Davis quote. Borrowed from "Biopic Of The Cool: Don Cheadle Channels A Jazz Legend In 'Miles Ahead'" by Amy Nicholson, www.mtv.com. March 30, 2016.

[–] MrBusiness@lemmy.zip 3 points 11 months ago

Thanks, bleeding gums Murphy!

[–] Lag_Incarnate@ttrpg.network 9 points 11 months ago

Imagine not getting to roleplay shopping because you're a wizard and spent all your money on scribing spells. Imagine thinking that keeps you from roleplaying during anyone else's shopping, assuming that you are also present for the shopping instead of doing something else.

I can't exactly talk though, last session in Curse of Strahd, my character basically turned the session into a heist because he had the best Stealth score and there wasn't enough Invisibility spell for the rest of the party. It's a CoS game, being seen by half the encounters is basically a TPK in and of itself. But he was able to turn what was supposed to be a scouting mission into a successful rescue and robbery, so it was kind of worth it.

[–] gerusz@ttrpg.network 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

If it's a common item with a listed price, and you're in a city big enough to reasonably have that item in stock, just do your shopping "offline". Sometimes I even include a low-level Forge cleric in small towns so the party could do their sub-100gp item shopping. (In that case the cleric charges an extra 10% donation for the Forgetemple, which they will use to feed orphans, create farming equipment, etc...)

[–] banneryear1868@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

Yup this is how we do it, don't count anything lower than gp either. Game time passes but not real time, and if you bargain you make corresponding roles, DM can decide if you get advantage or disadvantage depending on the context.

[–] blender2142@lemmynsfw.com 6 points 11 months ago (2 children)

What's roleplay shopping?``````

[–] teft@startrek.website 16 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

The PCs are in a shop and one of the players is roleplaying the shopping experience for everyone else.

[–] dlpkl@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Is this like a board game table top thing or a video game eg GTAV?

[–] EdibleFriend@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago
[–] bradorsomething@ttrpg.network 10 points 11 months ago

It’s Buying Dungeon Specific Materials. Just google BDSM

[–] sgibson5150@kbin.social 4 points 11 months ago

By chance I ran across a relevant video earlier today. Shopping should be fun! https://youtu.be/5kRLCKH6bA8?si=4E8KEGQhfJv8f8jZ

[–] savvywolf@pawb.social 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Yeah, this is super annoying. I want to try out roleplaying and get into character and all that, but in some tables you have people like the following:

  • The involved roleplayer who, despite their intent otherwise, takes control of the narrative. They try to involve you, but it always feels like you're a side character in their story.
  • The funny guy, who tries to crack jokes and make the whole game feel light-hearted and silly. I get we're all here for fun, but sometimes I'd like a bit of meat to bite into.
  • The GM's friend, who derails the game into taking about that cool dog that they had when they flat shared last year. No seriously, it's a cool dog. Let me find a picture on my phone.
  • That guy whose character is a reference to that show you don't watch. They keep making references to it, and a few other people get it, but you have to awkwardly nod your head.

... Wow, sorry, kind of went on a rant there. I guess I have a bit of frustration at going to play a game, and most of the session being taken up by not playing said game.

[–] mnemonicmonkeys@sh.itjust.works -1 points 11 months ago

You'd hate me. I'm somehow all of those points simultaneously

[–] Bye@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

This is why I don’t like RP. It’s abused by people who have my least favorite personality type. And you can’t tell them to stop, because someone else in the game is their friend and thinks it’s cool.

[–] pixeltree@lemmy.world 10 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Hey, not being judgmental, just curious. Are the games you enjoy more almost entirely combat? Or do you just skip roleplaying stuff like shopping? What would your ideal split be?

My first game I participated in (it ran for several years, with a bit of a ship of theseus situation, by the time it ended the GM and I were the only original ones left) was basically entirely combat. It was a super drag, but that was half 4e's fault. Tbh it wasn't good after we swapped to 5e but it was better. I still had fun because, you know, spending time with friends, but I really didn't enjoy it that much. I started playing with another group of friends and it was almost exactly opposite, almost entirely RP with very little combat for the most part, except for the occasional dungeon delve or something along those lines where it would be mostly combat for several sessions. I really loved that game and it really opened my eyes to how much fun the game could actually be. It's also really group/dm dependent though.

That game ended, and we're doing a new one with the same group, but one of the players is now co-dming, intending to do more of the combat while the original dm does more of the roleplay (splitting planning, equally active during sessions). We're only a couple sessions in but it's working out really well so far

[–] Bye@lemmy.world 14 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Tl;dr I’m a crotchety old fuck and I have a different idea of fun from some people; I like rolling dice.

I like a little bit of RP. Like there’s a quest giver in a tavern and he says there’s a monster in the forest, and you go there and you meet a witch, and she tells you about a curse, and then you go to the forest and use the curse knowledge to slay the monster. Traditional 1980s on-rails D&D shit.

The most important thing to me is that my character sheet and decisions determine what happens in the game, not my own personal charisma or rhetorical prowess. I don’t need to be an expert in fencing to stab a guard, or an expert in ninjutsu to sneak across a courtyard. Likewise, I shouldn’t have to be a master orator in order to convince some dude to tell me where he saw the monster. Let me just say I do that, and roll for it. And if other players get to talk their way out of shit, that makes me feel bad. Like you didn’t have to roll? Fuck you.

Also what I despise is when the game devolves into any one of the following very common tropes:

  1. You meet some NPC and one of the players just wants to talk with them forever about lore and story and shit. It doesn’t matter. She’s there to give you a McMuffin. Get the scroll of water purification or whatever! It’s fine if you have to do a bit of RP to get there, but the objective is not to learn about her grandchildren and their pet toad.

  2. Shopping, as mentioned in the OP. It is a huge waste of time. Just say “I go to the store and buy 3 healing potions” and you can look up how much they cost in the DMG or wherever. If the DM thinks you’ll learn something important while shopping, they’ll say “when you enter the store, a busty lizard woman winks at you with her second pair of eyelids. Roll perception”. “8”. “You notice she’s not wearing any underwear, but you don’t see any reason to be suspicious”.

  3. Combat is cool, and it’s like 60% of the character I made. It’s the most cooperative part of the game, and I think it’s fun.

  4. People who do voices drive me fucking insane, no, I don’t care if you listen to some podcast where people do that. It’s grating. This is a party preference thing and I know some people think it’s fun. I just don’t.

  5. The party splits up in a city and does different things. Oh great now the DM is going to be sidetracked by Glarfblarg’s lost eyebrow tweezers, and 2 or 3 people are just going to sit there watching other people play the game they showed up to play.

  6. This is a player problem, but “my character is so unique and important, please give us a side quest relating to my own personal tragic backstory”. No. Fuck off with that shit. If the DM decides to work that into the plot in a way that’s fun for everyone, WITHOUT BEING ASKED OR NAGGED, great. But if a player is insistent and tries to railroad the campaign into something narcissistic, fuck that.

So yeah I think RP is generally bad in anything above low doses. But that’s my personal preference and I think other people are free to enjoy it. I suspect people who got into the hobby more recently like RP more than others, because apparently podcasts exist and there are podcast people who make it fun to listen to, I don’t really know. But BACK IN MY DAY there was a necromancer in a cave beneath a gnarled tree, and he’s been stealing children from the village, and you have to go down there and kill him and his army of zombie babies. And no you can’t talk him out of it and make him good.

[–] austinfloyd@ttrpg.network 11 points 11 months ago

It sounds like you need to force more discussion in session 0 talks (or earlier). Do you want an RP-light, fairly linear game? Great! You're not alone. But everyone at your table needs to agree to that, or at least one of you is not having a good time.

I like a good hack and slash dungeon crawl. I also like RP heavy games. But those are two very different games, and it's good to have consistency within whatever game you're playing.

[–] veroxii@aussie.zone 8 points 11 months ago

I found this post by sorting by ALL and I've never done any role playing games. But I wanted to thank you for a great comment to read and an A+ old man rant. Upvoted from a fellow crotchety old fuck.

[–] pixeltree@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Absolutely nothing wrong with games like that! I feel you on player vs character charisma, and in backstory hooks and the like. Our DM really likes to hook our backstories into the game, and I frustrate him a little sometimes by usually keeping my background simple. Done right, the backstory hooks into current events, so it's not a "why are we doing this instead of the main quest" deal. Some of my favorite game memories are of conversations amongst the party characters dicussing what's going on with those hooks and helping the related character through it. I think it's really good for me though because our players are really good. We make sure that everyone gets involved, or if someone's not feeling it tonight we can steer more clear of them. We're not afraid to hand waive unimportant things, especially if/when the party gets split up. Everyone's really working together to make sure everyone's having a good time, and I feel like that's not as common as it should be.

Nothing against more strategy and combat focused games though! The teamwork is really what makes combat come alive in my opinion, and there's nothing more satisfying than a well laid plan coming together (except maybe everything going wrong and pulling it off anyways)

[–] pizza@lemmy.today -1 points 11 months ago