Ask Lemmy

You can always reframe your goals and set reasonable expectations for yourself. People often use "It's a marathon, not a race" as a metaphor for achieving long term goals. I think this metaphor sucks because a marathon is still kind of a race. Achieving your goals is more like putting coins in a piggybank. You will only be able to put in so many coins each day. And some days you will have no coins to give. But that doesn't mean you didn't put any coins in yesterday nor that you won't put coins in tomorrow. Be kind to yourself and know that you will get there eventually. Growth is not about intensity, It's about consistency.

One observation was very enlightening to me:

No one is responsible for the proper balance in your life but you. Not your boss, not your spouse, not your children, not your friends. Only you.

And it's truth. You can work 5 jobs, care about everything and everyone, then get a stroke and die. And the world won't end because of that. So you absolutely have to find the space and time for some improvement. No "buts".

...reducing the time online is a good idea.

You need a good change in your idea of philosophy of life and purpose.

While, for someone who doesn't know you, it might look like you are chasing your goals but it shouldn't be that for you. You should be living it. When in life you have challenges and goals, you're still living, but ur a hill upwards ur walking to then fly coming down after reaching the peak.

That chasing is actually your opportunity. That opportunity has a offer to make. Leave it and just walk around the hill and continue on the flat easy surface.

Find that hill, that struggle of your interest. So it doesn't look like chasing. When ur interests are associated with that hill then you can enjoy that process and don't think of escaping it and get away, resting from it.

Meditation are for the people do don't choose the hill of their interest that becomes a chasing.

Give up. Become a hobbit.

One of your goals needs to be taking care of your body. Earlier nights to get better sleep, time set aside to cook healthy food, hobbies that reenergize you. Schedule days off specifically to do nothing.

I'm a goal driven person. Once I hit my 20s I realized I was doing goal after goal after goal and not taking a break. I got worn down and sluggish. I nicknamed my goals "the eternal to do list" because no matter how hard I fight to get it all done, I'm always going to add more. So I schedule time for myself alongside my other tasks. Not only did I feel better, but having the contrast between work and relax days helps me better identify when I start getting burned out.

I remind myself of several things: progress is cumulative; it has inertia, meaning that it takes a while to ramp up, but also doesn't stop immediately when my attention waivers; and success is a spectrum.

Do what you can when you can. Don't worry about what you're not doing at every moment - focus those thoughts on planning blocks.

Your normal day should be set up to knock out your task list. And once a week or so, you can sit down to determine what new tasks are needed to support your long term goals.

It may sound obvious but reduce your goals. You can only do so much and if you have set your goals too high you'll always feel like you're trailing behind them.

Think of it like a marathon. You can’t run an endurance run without taking care of your body. That involves maintenance. Taking a day off, taking a break, taking care of yourself is part of you going the distance. Also, break down your main goal into smaller, more attainable goals. And put breaks between those smaller goals.