this post was submitted on 16 May 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] Pencilnoob@lemmy.world 109 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

Chainsaw and a skylight. A big one too, like one of these

And yeah, yeah, I've heard they are a pain to maintain and break easily. I don't care, I'll fix it every week if that means I get a balcony and fresh air every day.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 35 points 5 months ago (9 children)

You want a sawzall, not a chainsaw. The former is a precision cutting tool, the latter is for arboreal maintenance.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 28 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

I want a wrecking ball since that would be more fun and destructive, but ok.

[–] Jimbo@yiffit.net 7 points 5 months ago (2 children)

you know you want the destructive option

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[–] MrJameGumb@lemmy.world 68 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I guess I'd put up some tarps to prevent the inevitable blood splatter from staining the walls and floor?

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 13 points 5 months ago

The blood splatter is the decoration.

[–] x4740N@lemmy.world 44 points 5 months ago (2 children)

That's not a fan, it's a head slicer

[–] supercriticalcheese@lemmy.world 13 points 5 months ago

It's a hedge trimmer

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[–] Twinkletoes@lemm.ee 40 points 5 months ago

Cannabis plants and grow lights

[–] Ghostalmedia@lemmy.world 32 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Reminds me of my high school buddy who was in a family with 8 kids. Every closet in that house became a bedroom.

[–] tfw_no_toiletpaper@lemmy.world 34 points 5 months ago (2 children)
[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 29 points 5 months ago

What ru talking about? THey were clearly good at it.

[–] Daqu@lemm.ee 15 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] TheSaus@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 5 months ago

That must explain why boomers had so many kids, no netflix means all they could do was chill

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[–] Siegfried@lemmy.world 31 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

I would start by adding some fake blood stains around the fan

[–] Adulated_Aspersion@lemmy.world 12 points 5 months ago

I came here to specifically say this.

[–] captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 30 points 5 months ago (1 children)

with a bucket, a mop, a broom and dust pan, a shelf with some bottles of Windex and Soft Scrub and other S.C. Johnson(R) products, a stack of furnace filters against one wall and the front one always falls over, and probably a vacuum.

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[–] pjwestin@lemmy.world 28 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Get an artist to paint an airplane crashing through the ceiling and make the propeller the fan.

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[–] The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world 24 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Add some slanted flooring and decorate the whole room at the same angle as the fan.

[–] ivanafterall@kbin.social 16 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Then take psychedelics and lock yourself in.

[–] perviouslyiner@lemmy.world 7 points 5 months ago

Add a bit of a Dazzle paint scheme...

[–] RattlerSix@lemmy.world 22 points 5 months ago (1 children)

The weiling fan is decoration enough

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[–] wesker@lemmy.sdf.org 20 points 5 months ago

I wouldn't bother.

[–] cordlesslamp@lemmy.today 20 points 5 months ago (2 children)

That poor fan is just waiting to tear itself apart.

Why don't you turn on the fan then lock the door, and call it "the Schrodinger's room". Quantum mechanics says that after a while, the fan is both functioning and broken, spinning in an endless dance of probability.

[–] Draconic_NEO@lemmy.world 12 points 5 months ago (2 children)

You will likely hear the fan tear itself apart from outside of the room, such an event is absolutely loud enough to be heard from outside the door, plus the fact that the little bits of fan that are left afterwards will probably continue spinning and likely bumping into the ceiling (if it's hanging from the wires).

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[–] Tikiporch@lemmy.world 20 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I'm not sure who needs to know this, but they make angled mounting kits for ceiling fans.

[–] Death_Equity@lemmy.world 14 points 5 months ago

This isn't that type of situation. This room is not meant to be right. It is where only wrong exists. There is a litany of people who allowed this room to exist and they all knew what should have been, but they all allowed this space to come to pass.

This room is meant to not be, but has allowed to be because it is forsaken by the collective creation of humanity.

[–] duffman@lemmy.world 18 points 5 months ago

Enclose it and make a secret door to enter.

[–] Tetsuo@jlai.lu 16 points 5 months ago

I call it the depression portal.

[–] ivanafterall@kbin.social 12 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Add another fan a few feet to the left of the first one to make the room more visually balanced.

[–] sxan@midwest.social 7 points 5 months ago (2 children)

I was thinking... just more fans everywhere. On every wall.

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[–] Everythingispenguins@lemmy.world 11 points 5 months ago (3 children)

Wtf is with the low wall fan? It seems low enough that you could just walk into it. I am not the guy that people would call safety conscious, but I do draw the line at spinning blades hitting my head.

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[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 11 points 5 months ago

More ceiling fans.

[–] ramenshaman@lemmy.world 11 points 5 months ago

With my own blood after I hit my head on the fan.

[–] abbadon420@lemm.ee 11 points 5 months ago

How come nobody has mentioned a walk-in closet yet?!

[–] 01011@monero.town 11 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Fire would brighten up the room.

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[–] ReiRose@lemmy.world 9 points 5 months ago

Aside from aircraft painted on wall, I think put a mattress area on the floor (or comfy seating) and paint a galaxy in glow in the dark paint.

[–] hperrin@lemmy.world 9 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

Everything angled the same as the fan.

[–] Shanedino@lemmy.world 9 points 5 months ago (1 children)
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[–] Hobbes_Dent@lemmy.world 8 points 5 months ago (1 children)
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[–] nonailsleft@lemm.ee 7 points 5 months ago

VR racing sim

[–] stoy@lemmy.zip 7 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Put in a long clothes rack, boom! walk-in closet

[–] Bonehead@kbin.social 7 points 5 months ago

With a built-in clothes dryer!

[–] danekrae@lemmy.world 6 points 5 months ago

With a lack of passion.

[–] ryan213@lemmy.ca 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Posters of the bright blue sky.

[–] nul9o9@lemmy.world 6 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Remove the fan, replace it with a sunlight mimicking fixture.

[–] Death_Equity@lemmy.world 10 points 5 months ago

No, bare socket and bulb hanging from the wire that flickers.

This is the room you keep someone in or cry in, this is not space for a modicum of faux solar joy.

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[–] Crashumbc@lemmy.world 6 points 5 months ago

The fan won't last very long, the bearings aren't designed to operate like that. (Even if you don't hit it with your head...)

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