Oh noooo, he suffered a few days and then got to hang out with his dad in heaven for eternity and be worshipped by billions of people. What a sacrifice!
this post was submitted on 27 Nov 2024
709 points (99.3% liked)
Lemmy Shitpost
26949 readers
4345 users here now
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
Idk man I don't think I would be okay with being nailed to a cross even if i knew it meant living in heaven for eternity
It happened to a huge amount of people. The Romans crucified so many people, it was so common place, that they didn't even bother to write down how they did it. All I'm saying is, it wasn't a unique form of suffering that was particularly difficult to Jesus vs thousands of other people in history. If the difficulty of the death was the measure, he didn't go that far out of his way.
Fair enough, but I also don't think that we should consider a few days of suffering for an eternity of basically being god much of a sacrifice.
I wouldn't take an eternity of existence under any circumstances for anything. Please just let me fucking die when I'm done.
I wouldn't want the worship, but not being a regular mortal, having powers and omniscience and the like? Sure, I'd like that. Maybe I could make reality suck less for others.
There's a significant amount of rape in the BIble. And a lot of it is condoned.
Nowhere in the Bible does it say sex slavery is a bad thing. But it sure does like talking about how all of those divine kings had concubines.
"blasting rope" the synonyms for masterbation continues to grow longer
This is the internet, you can say masturbation, you know.
that was a spelling mistake but I'm gonna keep it as another synonym now lol
Or maybe that's not a sin 😏
"Spilling seed" is a sin... So confirmed that Jesus saw it and thought it was worth forgiving by dying on a cross for.
Eh. The thing Catholics use to say spilling seed is a sin is them completely misunderstanding what was happening.
So this dude Onan’s brother died without giving his wife any sons (or maybe children in general, I don’t remember). So according to tradition at the time, Onan was supposed to provide her with a son. But once he gave her a son, his job would be complete and he wouldn’t get to bang her anymore. So he pulled out.
The problem here wasn’t that he spilled his seed, it was that he spilled his seed in order to keep banging his brother’s widow.
But the Roman Catholic Church at some point was like, “OMG masturbation must be bad too!” So they decided that masturbation should he called “Onanism.” Which is ridiculous, dude is famous for pulling out, not jackin’ it.
🙄
Yeah I really don't care about why it's that way. I'm atheist. I just know that's what I was told when they were attempting to indoctrinate me my entire childhood. It's also part of why I quoted it... and why I treated it as the joke that it is.
But...
The problem here wasn’t that he spilled his seed, it was that he spilled his seed in order to keep banging his brother’s widow.
So the idea is that succumbing to hedonism is the problem (desiring the act over his duties)... of which I'm sure we can all agree that masturbation is basically 100% of the time outside of let's say clearing the chamber after a vasectomy or some other medical procedure. It makes sense regardless why catholocism would come to that conclusion based on their faith in the fictitious book regardless.
It’s less about succumbing to hedonism, and more the fact that he was disobeying God (and trying to screw the women he was banging out of an inheritance).
He was supposed to impregnate his brothers widow to provide her with a son. This was a “levirate” marriage - essentially, the son would considered his brother’s and would inherit his brother’s property. Women didn’t inherit property, so this was a common practice to make sure that widows were taken care of.
Onan pulled out because he didn’t want to get her pregnant - he wanted the inheritance for himself. So he was being a massive douche, and deserved it.
Every sperm is sacred, every sperm is great
If a sperm is wasted, god gets quite irate!
"Spilling seed" is a sin...
First off, I've never read the Bible, so apologies for any ignorance I'm about to display.
Second, how literal are we talking here? Like, do backshots count as "spilling seed"? What if she's a spitter, is she doomed to eternal damnation? Is hot creampie sex the only legal sex, according to the Bible?
Specifically, when you’re having sex with the widow of your brother who died before he was able to give her an heir with the purpose of ensuring she has an heir in your family as is your religious duty, it’s a sin to pull out before ejaculating.
I have no fucking clue... I think it's crazy. But the idea that Jesus witnessed all of that and decided that dying to absolve us of it all is fucking hilarious.
I just like the idea that he saw a donkey show and said, "yep... that's worth dying for!"
Is hot creampie sex the only legal sex, according to the Bible?
I do believe so...
Don't kink shame Jesus. He was human like all of us
No shame. Anything consenting adults want to do is fine. Just don't be weird and talk to me about your private affairs in public.
I find it hard to believe spilling it is more of a sin than saving it in a jar in the fridge.
I find it hard to believe spilling it is more of a sin than saving it in a jar in the fridge.
He saw that too... and died for it. So it must be worth it.
maybe that's what made their deity decide to die. seeing the future blast rope to waluigi and then save it in a jar
Must be the most divine act to make the son of god die to save it.
It would be disrespectful to stop at this point.
Now I get why the incels are excited with the ultraconservative agenda.
They say "biblical values" and incels hear "free rape."
Jesus died so we could have bread. He is risen!
Also, rape porn is very much in keeping with biblical values.
load more comments
(8 replies)
I don't understand why people are making it such a big deal. Jesus died, yes, but he has risen from the dead after a few days. So basically he only died for a weekend, for the human race. "Oh what a brave man! He gave up his weekend!" There are other people who did much more for the human race, like Fritz Haber for example. Also, necromancy isn't allowed according to the bible, so zombie Jesus broke the rules.
Fritz Haber for example
I mean....... Haber isn't exactly a giant of morality and ethics. He did invent most of the chemical weapons utilized in WW1, and expressly defended their use as weapons.
He tried to kill people and ended up helping feed the world, then he tried to feed people and ended up helping the Holocaust. The guy is a fascinating historical figure but definitely a was a monster.
load more comments
(3 replies)
Your dad sent you here to suffer and die? Big deal that's what the rest of us are doing.
load more comments
(1 replies)
Jesus wasn't a zombie, Jesus was a lich.
Edit: found the pic!
load more comments
(16 replies)
view more: next ›