up with trans

i decided to make my empanadilla experiment. they will have a sweet filling of blackberries. went out to collect a few more to supplement what i got this morning. i'm currently cooking a filling. i hope this goes well

i've been upsetting people by opposing the "it's not our choice" argument for like... 15 years or something. when i was a teen it really didn't land well with people. but i've seen a general movement towards people rejecting the argument in the past few years which i'm relieved about.

i very much agree that it concedes there is something wrong with being queer, that we wouldn't choose to be if we had a choice.

but even more than that i think it misses the point. choice means something very different to the people we're trying to reach with that argument. i mainly see those people as conservative christians, mainly american ones. and the thing is that they don't give a fuck what sexual or gender urges we have. their worldview is entirely different. it's based on seeking an ideal godly life based around a monogamous union between a man and a woman, having children and raising them in that same ideology.

they think queer feelings are sinful. but they have a general view of anything outside of their ideology is sinful. sex before marriage, infidelity, divorce, polyamory, even perfectly consensual and open polyamory, porn, and so on.

given how utterly commonplace and unsurprising each time we hear about a prominent conservative christian doing something "sinful", it seems obvious they have plenty of urges to do things they consider sinful. the choice for them is suppress these urges to live a godly life. they understand perfectly well that we're reacting to something we feel inside that we have no control over, but they want us to choose to do what they consider to be the right thing, and who cares if it makes us unhappy.

so i simply think that it's trying to use a liberal argument to people who just don't see the world like that. and yes, i think it's a very lib argument. look at us poor people who have this unfortunate condition but you have to be nice to us because it's not our fault.

i am queer. i am trans. i am intersex. these things are an intrinsic part of me, and i choose to embrace them. it's true there is no place for me in normal society. i couldn't pretend to be one of them if i wanted to. but why the hell would i want to be a part of a society that won't accept those cool and important parts of me, not to mention all of the evil shit it's build upon. it is of course unfortunate that makes life harder for me but i want my life. a queer life for me is loving who i want of course, but it's so much more than that as well. it's rejecting the heteropatriarchal norms of cishet society in the way i live and relate to others.

to conclude this comment which accidentally turned into an essay (sorry), i simply don't think it works. if we want conservative christians to accept us we need to target their beliefs about the family, and the concept of sin in general. unless we can change that, we're not going to make any progress with them.

thank you

ty i think my problem is i really wanna be doing the practical projects and i need rest

i has wood but no money. it's the logical solution. i decided to challenge myself to actually use proper woodworking joints rather than just screwing everything together like i usually do. i'm learning.

but also every bed i've ever slept on has been annoying, creaky, too low, and lacking in hardpoints. i'm hoping i can make the perfect bed for us.

but there's like a million things that need to be done. the bed is just one of them. what i really need to do is something in bed so i can rest.

i hope i didn't leave anything behind in the trash heap that's gonna stop me from progressing later on in ~~the game~~ life

i never know what to post here. my life sounds very strange to most people, and has little to do with being trans anymore. but i wanna do my part for the war effort. so have an update on my morning.

i drove to the nearest village to do my weekly check for mail. my package wasn't there. very annoying. but i didn't want to waste a trip so i went skipping and found some floor tiles, 10m of agricultural hosepipe, a bucket, a chair and a window frame. this will all come in handy.

i want to try making this now. someone pls stop me

thank you i'm frustrated but more worried about my partner who has been recovering slower. we're only starting to see the slightest improvement after a month and a bit. i hope your recovery gets faster.

i feel a little stronger today. managed to do more. been nearly a month since “recovering” from covid. i seem to be improving but its v frustrating.