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I took me a really long time and a lot of confusion to figure out that I'm ace
Saaaaaame...
I went from being homophobic because I mistook my being uncomfortable with overt sexual advances from anyone as being uncomfortable with gay men because "of course I'm attracted to women I just haven't met The One yet," to thinking I was bi because once I thought about it I realized I didn't really feel any differently toward men and women, to finally my now wife when we were dating introducing me to the concept of being asexual and I realized that yeah I do have the same attraction toward men and women... Zero.
Compulsive Heterosexuality is strong yo.
Someone who is ace explained it to me that it was very difficult for them to figure out if they were bi/pan or ace because they were equally attracted to everyone, it's just that the attraction was zero lol.
I can confirm that. At first I thought this "butterflies in the stomach" feeling was just an invention and I had girlfriends but I never felt a real spark. Then I got into a queer space and slowly figured things out. These days I always say I'm either content how I am or I have a happy surprise waiting for me, you could say I can only win.
It's not an easy sexuality to figure out, and I imagine the almost complete lack of ace visibility prior to cca 2020 did not help