this post was submitted on 22 Dec 2024
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Assuming good faith question: The (false) dichotomy of top/bottom implies a power dynamic in which the bottom is subservient to the top. In reality, it's often a simple preference and bottoms can domineer just as well as tops. Some prefer it that way. And there's more than top and bottom. Versatile is the obvious third option (no or changing preference for position) as well as side (prefers non-penetrative sex).
There's this stereotype (may not be the right word) that extends from the above in that tops are more masculine or powerful by virtue of topping, due to the tie with being dominant. Thus bottoms are more feminine and subservient. All of that is false and represents the gay community in a pretty bad, oversimplified, sexist-somewhere-along-the-line way.
The dom/sub axis is not the same as the top/bottom axis (not really an axis).
It’s not just the top/bottom part that’s problematic, it’s the entire post. The punchline is “Trump and Elon are gay for each other, isn’t that funny?” which centers the idea that it would be bad or wrong for them to be gay for each other, perpetuating the conservative stereotype that there’s something wrong with being gay.
Oh FFS.
We (gay people) have been pointing out the hypocrisy of homophobes with this sort of joke for ages and will continue to do it because it's fucking hilarious. We are, in doing so, celebrating that it's wonderful to be gay and sad that they don't see that or see there at times in-the-closet-like behavior.
The last thing thing I need is a bunch of word police telling me what I can and cannot say.
You know who IS making it seem like there's something wrong with being gay? People like you.
As a “joke” it treats being gay as derogatory. You’re welcome to make shitty homophobic jokes if you want to.
Nobody's telling you what you can and can't say. They're telling you that what you said is in bad taste, and youre telling them to stop saying that.
LOL. I'm pretty sure saying "that is just homophobia, by the way" is exactly trying to tell people what they can and can't say.
I disagree. If someone came up to me and said "Buenos dias! Donde estas el bano?" and I was like "that is Spanish, by the way", I have simply made an observation and have not implied that they aren't allowed to speak Spanish.
LOL. And you seriously don't see the difference between "hey that's homophobic" and someone speaking a different language and pointing that out?
Wow. Ok then.
No. "That's homophobic" and "That's Spanish" are simply statements of fact. It's left up to the listener whether they should continue being homophobic or speaking Spanish after it's been pointed out. It sounds like you've chosen to double down on homophobia. Not the choice I'd make, but you do you. Nobodys stopping you. No es mi problema.
If you are going to be basing arguments on statements of fact your comparison should be factual.
One is subjective opinion and one is relatively objective fact ( assuming actual correctness and there not being some weird exception like a subset language or something ).
Unless you are personally the global arbiter of what is and isn't homophobia, in which case ignore me.
Good call, I missed it. We've got layers of shittiness in this meme.
Sure, but the joke here is turning the dumb jokes of the homophobes against them, right? Calling a homophobe "haha u'r gay n a bottom" is kinda using their homophobia against them, no?
Also, I'm gay myself. If someone said "haha, u like taking it up the ass", I would be like, "sure I do!". Say this to a homophobe n they would be incredibly offended. So ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
But sure, I get why the morals of this aren't so straightforward.
You aren't wrong. It's rather philosophical at that point. There's the "don't say it because it's shitty angle" (quasi-mine, though mine was more a explanation vs a held belief) vs the "take it back from them" angle. Both have pros/cons and I'm not going to pretend I have the 'perfect' answer. The truth is probably that whichever is more effective/least damaging probably varies by context.
This is just absolutely ridiculous. It's thought police over-engineering for clout.
It's a dissection of why some people in the LGBT community may be offended. If you're unwilling to try to see the perspective of others and choose to instead reject empathy, that's a problem for you and the people around you. This internet stranger will continue to have a good day.
Also, clout? On Lemmy? Oh good, I've got the support of all 12 of us...
Are you part of the community?
I am.
Do you think the perspective of everyone in the community is equally valid?
Complicated. Everyone gets to have opinions and some of those opinions are going to offend people. It's arguably inevitable. The social consequences of having opinions of one kind or another is a pretty standard facet of being human. And validity is non-trivial to define. People have their experiences and they are valid to them but that won't excuse them from the consequences of having an opinion that is shitty (e.g. "Nazis weren't that bad" is an opinion that some people honestly hold and also merits a punch in the nose). So my shitty not really answer is "sort of?".
One caveat (arguably unrelated) is that a lot of people like to state wrong things as opinions (e.g "I think the earth is flat") and will claim that you can't refute them because "that's just my opinion". It's not, it's an objective fact. Those aren't valid.
Side note: I feel like you're trying to lead me to something and I approve of your style even though I feel like I'm about to be wrong about something.