this post was submitted on 21 Apr 2025
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i hate when people do this
It's definitely not fun but my mindset is that I'm the one who's put them in an uncomfortable position against their will so it's not really fair to expect a perfect answer.
same but she's so nice and neat as a person that I can't even be upset with her over it.
No, you need to debate them with facts and logic as to why they should love you.
Funny thing is that I've been saying "My rizz is like Ben Shapiro's debating skills. It can come off as strong and impressive against easy targets, but when dealing with someone serious and far more impactful, it reveals itself as a fraud."
fair, i've only had really non-confrontational people do this to me so i couldn't be too upset
i get why they do it but i still hate it lmao
Yeah, or any sort of indirect - non-confrontational communication. As I've gotten more experience I've learned to take it as a red flag in and of itself, though. I need someone who has the strength and decency to do direct communication. I know why people won't -- trauma, fear -- but having been in failed relationships with people who wouldn't do real-talk or direct communication no matter how safe I tried to make them feel, and seeing how that put unfair burdens on me and sabotaged those relationships, now I just won't fuck with anyone who can't be direct and upfront.
Still awful though especially because this sort of indirect communication is often the result of systemic sexism and gendered pressures and violence.