this post was submitted on 16 Dec 2023
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Reminds me of an issue I had with a real-life friend. It wound up torpedoing our relationship (and it was all my fault).
See, I really liked them, but they didn’t live in my neighborhood or anything. I wanted so bad for them to be an “organic” part of my life. It felt so fucked up that the people I saw every day, or would bump into a couple times a week even, are all fucking garbage humans; and here is the most awesome person I’ve ever met, and we’ll maybe bump into eachother once every couple of months on their way to boost shit from Buffalo Exchange. Then it made me upset seeing people who were organic characters in their life, how casual their interactions were, how they were the ones who got to watch their shit (they live in a bus parked in a shitty area), they were the ones who would like, get asked to split a motel room when it’s god fucking awful hot out, etc. I would try to come up with “excuses” to go see them. My mental health plummeted. And now I’m all alone just because the way I felt wasn't fucking normal.